I've spent my life
suffering by sorrow
A heart so full of love
dreading each tomorrow.
Hoping things would happen
making life worth while
I've always just wanted
someone to make me smile.
Someone I could share
my laughter & my tears
Someone I'd cherish
through all my years.
A new reason to live
and reason to feel
All I've ever wanted
was something real.
In a list
Please don't critique this.
Comments
1 - 40 of 40
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awwww so beautiful as always friend, you make my heart shatter in tears with such beauties you pen... well done!
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hey everyone! I'm sorry, buti have to close this contest! I feel really bad! BUT I JUST RAN OUT OF TIME! If you are in this contest message me and i'll give you 5 points for entering! I'M SOO SORRY! Please understand!
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hey everyone! I'm sorry, buti have to close this contest! I feel really bad! BUT I JUST RAN OUT OF TIME! If you are in this contest message me and i'll give you 5 points for entering! I'M SOO SORRY! Please understand!
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Wow, Im sure there are a LOT of people who can relate to this piece, I myself can. Its emotive, well written, and a pleasure to read. A beautiful piece.
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Very nice
I enjoyed this, you had areally nice rhythym going at first- but it kinda got thrown out at the end. -
Wow, I can relate to this piece from you.
Very beautiful as always bro!
Good luck to you in this contest and
keep up the wonderful work here!
Jeremy0826
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awesome, wasn't expecting it. It something you can read quickly that gives off an amazing aura of emotion
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Great job everything happens in the time it happens for a reason. Contenetment and trust that God will lead your life where it is supposed to be. We go through all different types of relationships in our lives all real but different. God will bring the right people in your life just
trust God.
Great job!
Mary Jo
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This is absolutely beautiful. Such sweet words grace this page, it's breathtaking. Amazing write, good luck in the contest.
Blessings,
~Michaela~ -
I like your poem so much! I think its better than mine. I feel like an amatuer writer compare to your work good job!
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This poem is absolutly breathtaking it is so sweet. I fully enjoyed it you are a very good writer. keep up the good work!
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This is such a wonderful poem it sounds almost like something my husband would write me. All and all its real beautiful
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you express what all of us want in a simple, honest way.
thanks and good luck in the contest.
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: ) You rhymed your lines like i do, second and fourth ^-^
i've always liked this rhyme scheme so i was excited to be able to read a poem, other than my own, that had it. Good job, it's a great write.
keep writing!
-Cass
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I enjoyed reading this piece. It's so simple and yet says so much about life, that's why it's beautiful.
Keep writing!
Nela
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That was so great....
Wow what a poem.....it almost sounds like something I would write. (that was a compliment)
Excellent really,it just flowed like a river, when you read it.....so smooth.
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I'm, speachless.
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aw a wonderful poem good luck in the contest
maralisa
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another amazing poem
i dont see how u do it all ur poems r so amazing and i really do wish i had ur talent -
soft slow easy flow well written and expressed it reads nice. keep it up
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Nice job I can definitely agree to the sentiments.
It's written well, but I think that the rhyming seems barely tainted by force. Remember, rhyme is good if it fits, but your words should dictate rhyme; never let your rhyme dictate your words.
Keep up the good work
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This is so sweet. I have this with my wife, she chases away the lonely and replaces it with warmth! You have penned your emotions so well! I am featuring this for "Today's Poem".
Blessed Be,
~Raven
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Wonderful
Very creative and well expressed. A well crafted write. Best of luck in the contest.
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amazing i am very impressed with what you havve shown me here good job keep it up
-All I've ever wanted
was something real.-
this has to be my favorite part good job and good luck
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I loved it keep up the awsome job
this was amaing and sweet. kepp sup the great job.
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Aww .... a sweet write. I liked it a lot, really tender. Hope this does well, it really deserves to! Great write.
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GOOD WRITE
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Beautiful!
This really hit the bottom of my heart!You have great flow and rhyming.I've been through something like this,and I want you to know there's always light that lies in the future.Keep on writing!
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Wow. This is very emotional and kind of heart breaking. But a wonderful write. I love it!
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It's pretty good.
I really like this piece, it's got a lot of emotion to it.
I could offer a better opinion if I critiqued, but I would rather make sure you're okay with it before I start putting my opinion out.
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wow
sweet poem
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This is a sweet simp;e poem and moves nicely. I am not one for contractions in poems and I suggest that you get rid of them here. In line 10 use "and" and not "&" that and your contractions are a lazy way of writing. Once your contractions are out the poem will be much more solid.Line 2 why not "suffering in sorrow" Line 3 & 4: "My heart is full of love/yet i dread each and every tomorrow" Do you get the general idea here? Hope this helps. You have a good poem here. It just needs some work. Good luck in the contest.
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Oh, It's not Terrrifice, Please Put some More Words, And Thoughts in it. it is just too simple
I wish to see some more happening of your heart
by
The Poet Of Hearts And Beautiful Words
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Ah for love we all would give
Never a finer reason to live
To enjoy every new day with another
knowing nothing is too much bother
I wish you well in your quest
True love remains lifes best
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Love only is real!
A new reason to live
and reason to feel
All I've ever wanted
was something real."All material enjoyments are only temporary and unreal. Love is reality and all happiness lies in it. Love and life are two sides ofa coin. love is life .words simple and flow natural.
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The only think I might change is the second line in the first stanza... by sorrow doesn't sound quite right to me... But the rest of the poem is very well written. I like it. Thanks for asking me to read this.
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A very lovely poem you have here. Full of longing and full of love if ever the opportunity ever came. Nice rhyming, steady and non-forced. I hope you do well in the contest, good luck.
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i loved it it brought lots of emotion in a few simple verses please keep writing!
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Lovely and so touching!
A beautiful wish that I hope comes true for you!
Great rhyme and flow...SO pretty!
Lynda
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this is a great example of hopeful writing. i like the rhyme scheme and 4 stanza seperations it flows smoothly and sugests lonliness and hope. dont give up its there
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