Dawn clambers, differed soul
kiss upon cobwebbed wing.
voice rustle, arms awaken.
Stroked the face of morning yellow.
Song sung, colours vibrant,
hover, silent morning show.
Author notes
Spanish fly
A contest entry
- Morning Quickie by Cerulean Sunrise.
475 points, ended May 21, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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beautiful
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:-)
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This is lovely, and a rare instance where I think some conjunctions could actually be added to enhance the work. Most of it feels like just random words strung together, and while I am the first to loathe fillers, eliminating them altogether is not a good idea
Other than that, I love this poem Good luck!
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Nice weaving.
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Thank you mark xxx
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Wonderful imagery and great abstraction. Excellent take on the prompt my dear.
~TW~ AKA
Raymond
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Thank you so much xx
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NP ^_^
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Wow, brilliant imagery in this piece. I really liked what you did with this. No fillers, making this slightly abstract. Great job and good luck in the contest.
Josh
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thank you xx
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It's been a while since I wrote a poem, then today I woke and said "I'm going to write again today"
So I am so pleased I have not lost my muse and so very glad you both liked my poem thank you so much xx -
Very creative... nice take on prompt!
becca
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this is so beautiful.
you have such vivid and gorgeous imagery in this. i love how you haven't used any filler words, it really leaves a bigger impact on the reader that way.
this is a nice take on the prompt, i like it.
best of luck in the contest
ElectricBloom
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