Buxom Shuffle

I've got my black boots and stockings paired with pink granny panties,
tonight there's no cock-blocking, I'm releasing my luscious vigilantes.

Some say you're beautiful when you're as thin as a twig,

But I think I'm beautiful when I'm bigger than big!

All the boys at the club will faint and swoon
my body's too bootylicious and it takes up the room,
As I zig and I zag, across the shrinking dance floor
by the looks of their nauseous faces, I can tell they want more.

It's a good thing I practiced my moves in the mirror,
Cause step by step, my grooves become clearer;

I keep my left breast in, and shake my right breast out

I'm doing the Buxom Shuffle, that's what its all about!

Dropping a golden dollar upon the dance floor,

it's time to show these hooligans step number four.

This one is dangerous, its called the bend and snap,

and to do it correctly you must show some crack.

Whether they're in front or back, getting cleavage or ass

everyone gets a show without ever having to ask!

As I snapped back up with bosom whiplash, 

I felt something odd, my back out of whack.

I felt a disk slip, and my spine go awry

The show's over fella's, I'm so, so sorry!

I crawled back to my room, and nobody helped

Each step I climbed, gave me pain and a yelp.

When I finally reached my room, and my bedside

I confronted my mirror, and asked why it lied

"You're lucious and voluptuous, 100% beauty.

I guess boys just don't want 250 pound granny booty!"