A poisoned will
A faltering heart
Tell tale signs so freshly carved
Whispering worries
Taunting moonlight
Baited by such broken promises
Patiently rigid
Painfully still
Author notes
This came out of a few lines that I had put together the other night, and to tell you the truth I have no idea what to make of it. I dunno, what do you guys think?
Comments
-
I love the style of this write. It has short simple sentences yet at the same time they are so powerful. Well done, this is really great.
-
I like the simplicity, it really suits the theme. My only real critique is that the short final lines feel adrupt coming right after one of the longer lines of the poem. Maybe you intended this, maybe it's not a big deal.
That's a good title for a poem, by the way.
-
i think this is an excellent poem although short. glad to see you posting something new. a lot is going on in your mind it seems.
Adding your comment:
