From osprey flight across ophrey clouds, she is
revealed in the shades before peach -- foretelling
the night was entering. The barracan cloak whispers
its surrender to gravity. She caught the last flight,
light coursed between mountains, upon her face.
Her feet drew in the promise of life, anogenic.
Ankles still damp with shadows, reflect articulate
grace as she stepped away from the wrinkled anguish
in the pen strokes of the cloak fallen behind her.
The air tugged at her unwilling to release her.
The upsweep up her breasts provoked
promised endings to taunts of desire. Delenda,
the suggestions of anger -- for now love, embodied,
redivivus. A cornucopia of joy with a flourish, as the last
barrier fell to the ground, her hair unbounded, lips full.
2:55 PM
May 8, 2009
Alexandria, VA
Author notes
Prompt:
Fifteen lines describing a beautiful woman, using these five words:
~anogenic: formed from below or beneath
~barracan: fine silk cloth
~delenda: things to be deleted or destroyed
~orphrey: gold or other rich embroidery
~redivivus: resuscitated, come to life again
A contest entry
- Surfacing...Beauty in Brief Breaths 15/15/5 by Blue Rew.
910 points, ended May 14, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think, what it makes you feel, how you are moved.
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Overcoming the barriers of being...
This is how I find this write reaching out to me.
I found the use of prompt words subtle and
effective. The last line leaves all the constrictions behind, shows us the sheer beauty of acceptance.
Blue
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This is an admirable use of the words in the challenge, Tomis. But there are two words they required which leave no feeling but intellect, no matter how they are used: "anogenic" and "redivivus".
That you can incorporate them so well and still maintain the deeper essence of the poem speaks volumes of your talent to pen the more ephemeral Venusian qualities of a woman.
I'm truly impressed!
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I agree. Giving certain words a new coat of feelings takes changing the way they are recieved. For anogenic it was making it feel more poetic, for redivivus it was having it in a echo and reflective setting. Mostly, I sat with them until I could get them to sing in my head. Glad you got so much from my simple descriptive verse.
s
Love,
Tom B.
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Great piece of poetry
Very well written and so expressive.
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Thanks, I find it challenging to write descriptive poetry that has immediacy and presence. This particular contest made it more so.
Peace,
Tom B.
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OMG! Had I not read the author's note and discovered that you had a prompt of words to use, I would have never thought it to be so. Your using these words simply made the poem more powerful. Your descriptive narrative of the beauty of this women shares with the reader your keen eye and ability to hone in on pure loveliness. This is splendid! Anyone who can use the word; "cornucopia" with such grace is surely a master of words. I wish you the best in the challenge dear brother.
Always ♥
Renee
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It was a challenge, I will admit, to be lyrical and sensual with words I was not accustomed to. Part of what made it tantalizing to me. Cornucopia was me showing off.
. Thanks for sharing the pleasure and joy you found within my words.
Love, Tom B.
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Excellent
Again, a very fine write, my friend. As usual, you have expressed your thoughts quite well. Thanks for sharing this one. -
The agony and ecstasy of self doubt and being allowed to fly or fall. Sometimes you just have to stand by and watch it happen without words. C
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Thank you. I, only, catch the feathers that fall from wings and remark upon angels.
Love, Tom B.
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This seems to me like a tough challenge, but you managed to pull it off beautifully!! Wishing you all the best!! Peace, xx Cyn 
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Thank you. I had to get the pronunciation right and play with the possibility of meanings before I could start. Then only fifteen lines to catch the beauty. So much more to beauty than the shell. I am starting to ramble. Glad you felt it got the challenge handled.
Love,
Tom B.
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the lady in silk, with creamy peach skin....surely has touched hearts...this is so well written. I adored the word use; your talent is dynamic my poetic friend...........novy
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Fifteen lines and five particular words was a tough challenge. I am glad you feel I have succeeded. I tried to catch the spirit as well as the form.
Love, Tom B.
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