Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Post Partum "Anti"-depression

Baby grins but won't tell me

The joke she heard clandestinely;
"Is it my face at which you smile

And has you wondering all the while?"


"Come up here, just let me look,
Let me know you like a book";
Her hair...my nose...our eyes...so blue,
"Could that be what is tickling you?"


"Go on now, be off to sleep,
I'll not wake you, won't make a peep;
I think I'll sit and rock awhile

And recall the night you made me smile."

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 57 of 57

  • JT Sammer
    November 13
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    I just finished rocking my 2 year old daughter back to sleep after she woke up from a nightmere and now I think I have a poem I will read her when she does it again. I loved it, espically when my own daughter's eyes are blue Wonderful, wonderful write!

    Peace & Love

    ~J


    • adios muchachos gold member
      November 13
      ?
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks JT...

      ...for your kind note on this poem. Something I did after a long dry-spell.
      Hey, I read your author's page and I'm also a Dylan and Kennedy fan. Saw him last at the Hard Rock/The Joint here in Vegas. Great show!

      Wonderful you've got a little girl! God bless all of you!

      John-Nevada

  • Bob Fox
    November 12
    ?
    Edit | Reply

    John

    nd as I see my two year old , blue eyed grandson in my arms , I smile as I rock him to sleep. Just a lil part of heaven.


    • adios muchachos gold member
      November 13
      ?
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Bob

      Thanks for your thoughts on this poem. First poem I'd written after a long hiatus.

      Glad you liked it.

      John


  • LdyBrknWing gold member
    October 31

    Edit | Reply

    Aaaawwwwww

    John, this is PRECIOUS! And I really identify with this, as I'm just back home from spending two weeks with my newest granddaughter. This made me wistful, as I miss her soooo very much. It's never ceased to amaze me how someone so tiny can get into your heart so quickly, and get such a hold there; but she definitely has done that! While the entire poem was so dear, that last verse really got to me, 'cause as recent as yesterday, at work, I was thinking about that little angel, and remembering her precious smile. I read several of your comments that came before, and was interested to see that you don't have children of your own. You'd certainly NEVER guess that from this piece; the genuine love of a litte one shines out from this. You have to be an exceptionally talented poet to conjure that, my friend! Beautiful work! I'm SO glad I read this one!

  • Vera Rich
    October 21

    Edit | Reply
    I see no problem with the quotation marks as such. They distinguish between the remarks addressed specifically to the baby - either in thought or aloud - and the more general remarks made to the reader.

    However, this distinction breaks down in the final couplet. Since the poet is addressing the child directly (you), then logically this couplet should also be in quotation marks.

    You could, of course, get round this problem by replacing "you" by "he" or "she" as the case may be - but I have to say I do not find this couplet entirely satisfactory... Was there only ONE night in the past when the child made his/her father smile?

    Perhaps you could think about this.

    By the way, congratulations on your splendid rhyming. Simple - but simplicity suits the subject of the poem... And what a contradiction to the IDIOTIC view - which I have heard expressed by someone who considers himself an authority - that "Americans do not understand rhyme".


  • SeXyBabyGirl21
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    this is a type of poem i would write...(jk) but good job ...nicly written and nicely said...i liked this..i liked the background and how that the words sometimes rhymed...nice keep going...

    • adios muchachos gold member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks a lot for your note

      I'm deliberating whether to take out all the quotation marks or not. I'm waiting to hear from a friend who knows a great deal more about this than I do.

      Glad you liked this. Means a lot!

      John


  • mravinsky08
    October 20

    Edit | Reply
    In poetry, quotation marks are sort of an oddity. They are used to give speakers character within their quotes and what have you. Here, however, there is only one speaker so the quotations are unnecessary. The whole poem is in quotations. It's really philosopical and a bit esoteric but I think you get the drift.

    The poem was really charming. It's nice to read some light poetry sometimes. Good job.

    • adios muchachos gold member
      October 20
      Edit | Reply

      Mr Ravinsky

      You could very well be right about those. But since you are about the second of 48 comments to mention it I shall pass this to a pro we have on the site, and if it is unacceptable to her I shall change it, but I will have to have a categorical no to the query.
      If you are in London, she lives there as well.

      Thanks for your interest in this poem.

      John


  • klassy lassy
    September 29

    Edit | Reply
    Awww, John, my heart melts. What a cutie, and that's the way it is, too! It's been a long time since I was around a baby, even though there are two less than a year old in my family. Loved the poem, too. It set me to thinking how spontaneous those little one's smiles are!

    Karen

    • adios muchachos gold member
      September 29
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Karen

      Glad you liked this one. Kind of a fiction since I don't have kids myself, but in not a few I've seen this smile that comes from nowhere, and about what, God knows!
      I wish I could be that happy!

      Thanks for stopping by.

      John

  • crawlingkingsnake
    September 28

    Edit | Reply
    truly a great poem,the little things in life are what matter,and usually make meaningful poems, enjoyed it a lot, nice job here


  • Barry Hodges
    September 14

    Edit | Reply
    I'm not to sure about all the inverted commas - you can have too much of a good thing. Which you do. Quite sweet apart from the over-punctuation, though.


    • adios muchachos gold member
      September 15
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks a lot on the commas thing.

      You are right, got me bogged down in the flow as well.

      john


  • TwoTimeSurvivor
    August 31

    Edit | Reply
    Ahh this poem is really sweet. I love this!

    Sometimes children laugh at really random things and the only annoying thing is that they won't share their secret.

    I really liked this poem. and shall definitely return to see more of your writes!

    • adios muchachos gold member
      August 31
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks TTS...

      ...for your note on my poem! Glad you thought well of it! Made getting up today worthwhile!

      Thanks again!

      John


  • Desiree-Valdez
    August 21

    Edit | Reply

    Sweet!!!

    IM BACK..... LOL!!! I am glad to come back and see such a great write from you, I love the flow in this poem! I love:
    Her hair...my nose...our eyes...so blue,
    "Could that be what is tickling you?"

    Beautifully written, you can feel the appreciation for this child and the joy it has brought. Wonderfully written!!

    • adios muchachos gold member
      August 21
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Des...Welcome home!

      Big surprise to see your name on my screen! Sounds like you are doing fine.
      Baby is 5 already? Que caray! A donde va el tiempo?
      Hope you get back into your writing right away. Have to put you back on my favorites.(I got mad one day and trashed the whole thing)
      Looking forward to hearing from you, Desiree.
      Oh, I'm glad you liked this poem! I really don't have kids myself, but wondered
      what I might say if I did.LOL

      Be good!

      John


  • poetryality silver member
    August 20
    Edit | Reply
    YUP!

    • adios muchachos gold member
      August 20
      Edit | Reply

      Yup is right!

      You did comment on this before, not that I ever tire hearing from you, Renee.
      How is everything? Sounds like everybody's doing good if I'm reading good between your lines.
      Don't know where this poem came from as I've never married nor had children.
      Maybe I was doing like you do sometimes, acting!LOL Well, I guess I was role playing a bit.
      You're going to notice that I put you back on my favorites list, not that you ever were off it. I went off on a tangent and trashed the whole darn thing and forgot a lot of people who were on it.
      Renee, I can't for the life of me rhyme two words together so I've been lying dormant here, but I've got high hopes yet.lol

      Be well

      Love,
      John

  • poetryality silver member
    August 20

    Edit | Reply
    I love the way my husband used to hold, look, and talk with my children when they were small. Now, I adore the way he smiles when they are calling on the phone for him. He always says; "is that my baby". All, the same, the two boys and the two girls. Our children call us "the baby stalkers". I truly feel like I've written all this to you before after reading this poem. I think I did... let me click submit and see. LOL


  • tstock
    July 24

    Edit | Reply

    yes

    my four children were born at home and i 'caught' my son while waiting for a midwife to arrive. not bonding in the same way a mom does, some of what you wrote can transcend gender. very nice.

    • adios muchachos gold member
      July 24
      Edit | Reply

      tstock

      Glad you liked the poem. We were five kids, the second born at home too.
      Four boys first and then a girl. That's when my Mom threw in the towel!LOL

      Thanks again for taking a look at this, andthis note, which made my day!

      John-Nevada


  • joyfuljossie
    July 13
    Edit | Reply

    soooo-

    you really made me smile thank you... What a great write

    • adios muchachos gold member
      July 13
      Edit | Reply

      GBFK

      You'll be writing your own PP moments before long!
      Glad you liked the poem. Don't they sleep in Canada anymore?LOL

      John-Nevada USA


  • Immortal Obscurity gold member
    July 10

    Edit | Reply
    This is so cute! Babies always seem to be in-tune with things that we, their older relatives, are not. I love this, and thank you so much for entering!

    Laura

    • adios muchachos gold member
      July 10
      Edit | Reply

      Laura

      Yes, it has always intrigued me as to what they are grinning about.
      Maybe they are thinking, "Hi, where am I ?"
      Thanks for reading and leaving your note.
      Means a bunch!

      John-Nevada


  • quantumsurveyor
    July 5
    Edit | Reply
    It's merely wind! LOL No, seriously, a delightful tribute.

    • adios muchachos gold member
      July 5
      Edit | Reply

      You may be right!

      Sans company, I still take a little pride myself if I can produce a gust or two!LOL
      Sorry I do not use your name here and I should know it as I've seen you on the site for a few years now. My apologies.
      Thanks for taking a look at this!

      John


      • quantumsurveyor
        July 6
        Edit | Reply
        You're lucky to be able to take pride - at my age my gusts are sudden and uncontrollable HeeHee!
        Donald


  • Thunder Child
    July 3
    Edit | Reply
    a baby? aw!!!! great poem!!!!!

  • Xxpoison.kissesxX silver member
    June 26
    Edit | Reply
    Awwh, cute write, and nicely put!:]


  • Cup-a-Joe
    June 8

    Edit | Reply
    John,
    You rhymed? i didn't notice untill i read some comments. That's a good sign that it's done correctly.
    Those little ones-great arn't they?
    Joe

    • adios muchachos gold member
      June 8
      Edit | Reply

      Hey Joe

      Yeah, I was seeing if I could still rhyme words!LOL
      Those unsolicited grins from babies are sure a mystery. Makes you want to look around over your shoulder and see what the smiling is all about!
      Thanks for your note, and I'm glad ,you liked this.

      John


  • Tzipora
    June 1

    Edit | Reply
    very nice, the title got me to read it... nice write

    i can point out several favorite lines. good job: )

    • adios muchachos gold member
      June 1
      Edit | Reply

      Tzipora...

      ...thanks a lot for your note on this poem. Glad you liked it. Guess I was seeing if I could rhyme two words together!LOL

      Thanks again!

      John


      • Tzipora
        June 2
        Edit | Reply
        lol. anytime... keep writing like that and i;ll keep having to come back for more: )

  • celadia
    May 14
    Edit | Reply
    Awww. so cute, so lovely.

    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 15
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks Celadia...

      ...for your note. I'm glad you liked this. I was just seeing if I could still rhyme. Been a long time.
      Thanks again, kinda made my day!

      John

  • montez gold member
    May 12
    Edit | Reply

    Rather...

    .............cute.
    Robin.

    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 12
      Edit | Reply

      Hey you scallywag!

      Long time no see! How have you been? Didn't post this for comments but am getting them nonetheless.
      How is life treating you? Hope you are well and prospering.
      Been thinking of that invitation you made me, but I can't get off the ground here.
      I'm doing OK, just not writing. Not everyone is sad about that fact either.
      I must have knocked you off my favorites inadvertently. My favorites list grew to be the same size as the list of people blocking me and I had a tizzy and trashed everything. I will rectify that when I'm finished here.LOL

      It is good to hear from you, Robin.

      John


  • poetryality silver member
    May 11
    Edit | Reply
    I too have had the occasion when I ponder the thoughts of little ones. In the past year, we have had a set of twin girls, two more girls and a boy and are awaiting the arrival of three more babies (my oldest daughter included, who is due in June). I usually speak for them, saying things like; "why you so close in my face granddad?" and "oh my, does your breath ever stink..."

    This is wonderful, airy, and filled with the cheer that babies bring.


    Much Love ♥

    Renee

    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 12
      Edit | Reply

      Hi Renee

      Glad you saw this being the matriarch of the Jackson-Matthews clan. Was just trying to rub two words together and see if they rhymed. Guess they did a little bit. Hope to write more soon.

      Thanks for your note here, means a bunch!

      John


  • condor gold member
    May 9

    Edit | Reply
    Yes. Sometimes when i see the smile on a little ones face in the cradle, i wonder what had got their fancy. Something obviously got them to smile. A wonderful piece that is so peaceful in its delivery and which also makes one smile. The subject matter will appeal to many. Great going. Yah!!!!! A poem!!!!


    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 10
      Edit | Reply

      Hi

      Yes, I broke down and attempted a poem, but all I got was rabbits!LOL
      Maybe try something else soon.

      John


  • Rose Angel gold member
    May 8

    Edit | Reply
    Ah,John, such a poem in a reverse mode of how parents can make a difference to the little infant of the past...Our nurturing spirit never leaves them....I adore this write! Bookmarked..

    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 9
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks a lot Rose

      This is the first incursion back into writing and rhyming since I don't know when!
      Thanks a lot for your note regarding this poem. Much appreciated.

      John


  • Sunshine Always
    May 8

    Edit | Reply
    So much of us lives on in the children John.This wonderful piece takes me back to the children being small and cradling them in my arms in the old rockingchair in the garden, just listening to the sound of them breathing... Lovely...mal


    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 9
      Edit | Reply

      Thank you Mal

      Haven't rhymed two words together in a very long time.LOL
      Glad you like3d this poem.
      Thanks again!

      John

  • Lady Dragonwyck
    May 8

    Edit | Reply
    This is really cute. Brought back memories of my two daughters when babies.

    Lady Dragonwyck


    • adios muchachos gold member
      May 9
      Edit | Reply

      Glad you liked this

      Poem was predicated on a conversation I had with my sister.
      Thank you for your comment.

      John


  • arafura gold member
    May 8
    Edit | Reply
    Love it! A pleasure to read, poet.

1 - 57 of 57