Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

~Deception~

 

 

 

 

Darkness sneaks up

shatters the truth, deception is

easily spoken, the cries of a wolf

echo’s through out the hills stirs

up dissension.

 

 

 

The crowd gathers come to see,

walk unknowingly  into a fool’s folly.

he masquerades in many faces has

you blinded by all his fantasies.

 

 

 

you will hear honey laced lips sweet;

beware they are traced with venom

they speak of innocence, trying to

overcome defeat, tricking you into

believing.

 

 

 

that he is who he is, but I know

him only as a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

 

Rend The Veil

 

Author notes

I hope i came close to what you were looking for.

if you have any revisions please IM so i can make them

privately

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 59 of 59

  • Xianaria gold member
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    Hi Rend ~

    Great images & phrasing! Loved "fool's folley" and the scene that plays out here.
    The masquerade, the honey laced lips traced with venom, right down to the classic line of deception: wolf in sheeps clothing.

    Wonderful job, my friend.

    Love & blessings,

    ~ TIm


  • Swan song gold member
    September 10
    Edit | Reply
    uniqe That is you and this is well penned No lack of awesomeness here!


  • penman gold member
    August 16
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Wow, such an amazing write. And so very well written. Thank you for sharing your time and talent.


  • SteveS gold member
    June 16

    Edit | Reply
    Oooh, this part.."speak of innocence, trying to

    overcome defeat, tricking you into

    believing." tells it all. Great write.


  • awannabepoet
    June 14
    Edit | Reply
    There are many wolves out there some come in the form of men whiler others retain thier beastly attitudes others may well appear as ordinary as a town squire.

    All we can hope to do is have a good shepard that will keep us safe and true.

    I like it, I like it so!


  • white stone
    June 10

    Edit | Reply
    This is very good, I am well aware of how those honey lips are capable of dripping venom. Dug your phrasing and sentiments.

  • AWESOME !!!
    This Is such a wonderful piece sure to kick some major ass .....I wish you the very best In the contest

    • Thank you so much for your encouragement
      I am truly blessed, I do want to kiss some major ass though, lol

      Blessings
      Rend

  • To me, this speaks of naive, reckless love affairs and the almost always resulting emotional damage if one is not careful.

    Powerful write dear.

    • yes it would speak that way, and understandably so,
      but we know the real reason for the sheep in wolfs clothing
      I just couldnt help my self lol, thank you Bro, your comments are
      always honest and a blessings

      Rend


  • sheltered
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    a little tricky to
    wrap my tongue around
    on first read
    but better savored
    like the plot lots

  • ricachic gold member
    May 14

    Edit | Reply

    Nicely done

    Nice job of portraying the "wolf", but he only exists because he speaks what you want to hear. That's the whole attraction to this "bad boy". He also makes for good writes. The wolf is bitter sweet
    There's a little wolf in all of us.
    Love your writing style.
    Chic

    • Yes there is hehe, thank you so much for your comment and clappies
      Blessings

      Rend


  • Andi. gold member
    May 11
    Edit | Reply
    brilliantly put.
    thanks for sharing and best of luck

  • i love the background, this was truly a magnificent piece, dear, i love the imagery and flow and message within.

    • Thank you so much, Sis you are a treasure in my chest of Jewels
      a diamond sparkling!
      Blessings

      Rend


  • Nevel
    May 9

    Edit | Reply
    I think you have caught the essence of "a wolf in sheep-cloths" very well. Some wonderful lines with brilliant imagery. I like your unique style of writing. You gets a more distinguished poetic voice. Good luck to you
    Erwin

    • Erwin,
      thank you for your comment and your encouraging words
      blessings
      Rend

  • friend
    May 9

    Edit | Reply
    Rend you have wrapped your words around a concept that many have trouble with. everyone has experienced deception, but the depths of our experience is what makes it so hard for others outside our experiences to really feel what we try to convey, but you've done really well with it in this poem, and the background you've chosen also transmits the complete darkness we feel when we are its victim.

    • yes my friend, thats so true, and one day i pray this will be far behind us
      blessings my friend, and you are

      Rend

  • What a fantastic title that now your poetical words voice.
    I can hear them spoken..
    loved the last stanza
    Best wishes and good luck to you
    Julie

    • thank you so much,
      your comments are most welcomed

      blessing and love Julie
      Rend


  • Sandygram
    May 7

    Edit | Reply

    Hello Sweet Niece

    You have penned a lovely poem with stunning imagery about deception!. A pleasure to read. Take care. Hugs and Smiles.

    Always, Aunt Sandy

    • hello my precious Aunt ,
      thank you so much for coming by and commenting
      its always a pleasure.

      Blessing

      Rend


  • geckogirl silver member
    May 7

    Edit | Reply
    Rend, this is totally awesome, your golden pen & the background.. a wolf in sheep’s clothing, there are plenty of those that we need to watch out for.. very strong indeed... thank you so much for sharing with us and good luck hon in the contest...
    Sue

  • great poem my friend, as always. good luck in the contest!!!

    • Hey Kevin,
      My friend long time no see,
      I am so glad your back,
      and thank you so much for your
      comment
      blessings
      Rend


  • poppa
    May 7

    Edit | Reply
    excellent write... makes you wonder just how well you know people, especially in cyberspace

    • Hey Rob,
      thank you so much for your
      comments and support,
      its always a blessings

      Rend


  • jcat gold member
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    Th is reads like ancient times of yore when they left the fair maiden tethered to a post on a rock as the tide was coming in as a sacrifice to the angry "gods" only to be rescued by "prince charming" !!! Utterly gorgeous!! Love it and the background is heavenly!! Well done and best wishes

    • Jody,
      I am so blessed! your comment had so much depth in it
      and your take was awesome! thank you so much for stopping by
      I am now on my way to your place,

      Blessings

      Rend


  • BluesMan gold member
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    Ah, it is a bitter sweet liberation when the thin vail of deception, lifts from fogged in eyes.
    The freedom is oh so sweet, but more often than not is overshadowed by the callousing of your character. One must always be vigilent, not to fall pray, to their emotional bomarang.
    Great poem and some killer metaphores.

    • thank you!! what a surprise to see you here,
      and have your wonderful comment.
      thank you so much my Bluesy friend
      Blessings
      Rend

  • I love the use of 'wolf in sheeps clothing' and the whole metarphor throughout this piece highlighting deception, the danger and distruction it can cause but also how easily people can be taken in without realisation, how easy it is to accomplish.

    Good write.

    • oh don't you know it, it is so sneaky...
      but God didn't make people without brains,
      thank God for discernment

      Blessings to you my sweet friend
      Rend


  • Daizee silver member
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    First, the background.. I LOVE it!
    You've written about something that we've all probably encountered. I especially like the part of the crowd "come to see.' I'm not sure how you intended it, but it made me think of how foolish you feel when you realize you've been deceived and feel like everyone knew..except you. You've described the person perfectly. From the charming sly ways up until your final words... bravo!!

    • Stacy,

      I didnt see it that way, but then again its a perfect take,
      i saw it as a someone crying wolf and all the attention they get
      doing it, but i love your view better, i might add,
      Thank you my sweet sis,
      bless you so much

      Rend

      pssss I have a pair of those black sexy boots
      love them !


  • penman gold member
    May 6
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    Very powerful write. So very descriptive. And such an amazing write. Best of luck in the contest.

    • thank you so much for your support,
      I have treasured our talks , I learn so much off you,
      thank you again my sweet AP Grandpa.

      Blessings

      Rend:

  • This has a chilling air to it, many people are not who they appear to be, god I have met a few in my lifetime but they are never so clever that they can fool you for long. Lies are harder to remember than telling the truth. Strong and wonderfully done my friend C

    • Oh Chez,
      who could be more blessed than i with your friendship,
      thank you so much for your comment.
      blessings and thank you

      Blessings and Love

      Rend


  • Ademon
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    But a wolf in sheeps clothing... wow. What a strong ending, I don't believe there is anything that I would change or ask you to revise it's a strong poem...very strong and I loved it alot thanks for entering my contest!!!

    • The man of the hour thank you for your comment, ,that means alot Aaron, as always its a pleasure my friend,I hope i penned what you were looking for.

      blessings

      Rend


  • Swangrnv gold member
    May 6

    Edit | Reply

    WOW

    This is outstanding! love the piece, the background
    the concept..everything works perfectly together to pull the reader into the truth of this 'deception'.. i'm bookmarking!

    • swan you found me yeah, deception is a tricky thing
      thank you my sweet friend,
      Blessings

      Rend

  • Hey.

  • Another wonderful thought from you dear Rend!
    I hope that you do well with this entry here.
    Thanks a lot for sending it my way and keep up the great work here!




    Jeremy0826

    • Oh Jeremy,
      my precious friend, I am so thankful to you
      for the support you give,

      Blessings

      Rend


  • DolceVito gold member
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    Outstanding write Rend, one of your best...The wolf-sheep corelation reminds me of what they say about the devil...beautifully done

    • Hey Vito, your right on with the prompt,
      you never know who your up against one day your friend
      the next day your foe, satan is like that though

      Blessings

      Rend

      • DolceVito gold member
        May 7
        Edit | Reply
        Well, I said "what they [people] say about the devil," but that doesn't mean I believe such entity exists...I don't believe in that stuff...As far as friends, just "friends," they come cheap, really; good friends, on the other hand, are rare and precious...Good friends are people we actually know to be real, people with whom we have coffee, or go to movies, share deep thoughts and innocent hugs...So, I say treat everyone friendly, but be leery...Again, The following is what people say and not my thought: When the devil is nice to you, he or she wants your soul.

        • i love your disclaimer, The following is what people say and not my thought: When the devil is nice to you, he or she wants your soul

          Rend;f

          • DolceVito gold member
            May 7
            Edit | Reply
            It's not a disclaimer, I have nothing to disclaim...I don't believe in that fairytale stuff, it is just folklore to me.

  • Illustrious characterization of a "wolf in sheep's clothing".....Love the wolf metaphor and the images you present as you pen line by the ominous portrayals...

    • Thank you Mom,
      your continoues support is a pleasure always
      Blessings to you

      Rend

1 - 59 of 59