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cosmic latte

Missing image

 

 

 

 

i
at 3.30am
while her body was sleeping
she read a book
about how to make snow
the traditional way -


she lifted her cloud high

and waited

 

 

 

 

 

 

ii
it felt like the cold side
of a pillow dipped in heat
then painted over
the punctuation of her body -

 

waiting

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

iii
she lay like a
breeze you could almost
s e e


and
held tight the patience
of cosmic latte

 

 

 

 

Author notes

image credit

 

 

N.B.: Cosmic Latte is a name assigned to the average color of the universe, given by a team of astronomers from Johns Hopkins University. The colour is #FFF8E7 which is the colour of this background.

 

 

 

penguins

In a list

A contest entry

.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 25 of 25
  • J Macabre gold member
    July 3

    Edit | Reply
    I dont know i cant see like maybe this is a write about absolute comfort??? Just seems that way with the lady floating suspended in the air and the write makes it that much more vivid. Absolutely thought provoking.


  • Night Terrors
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    good job. I very diffrent poem to be sure. loved the picuture!!! I am really very glad you entered this. Thanks for entering I give this a 5/10


  • PhoenixFaith
    June 11

    Edit | Reply
    Very interesting and deep write. Thanks for sharing this. And the picture is really neat.

    best of luck and thanks for entering.
    Kate

  • A Prophet of 3 gold member
    June 10
    Edit | Reply
    hell ... this is damn good (and i don't say that about many)


  • Nangaleema
    June 4

    Edit | Reply
    very fresh write!
    i love learning this about cosmic latte - i live for these tidbits!
    thank you for sharing.


  • Maili Knephthan gold member
    May 31

    Edit | Reply
    This is a very deep write. I really enjoyed it a lot. You did a good job on it. While I am not even going to pretend to understand where you were going I still will say that I felt a sir of emotion from reading a bit of mysticism Thank you for sharing this write.


  • Serenity-words
    May 27
    Edit | Reply
    Your words are so mystical, I love it. It draws you in so beautifuly.


  • painfully amazing
    May 22

    Edit | Reply
    this was amazing! i loved it

    she lay like a
    breeze you could almost
    s e e

    great description.
    ♥


  • ears2hearyou gold member
    May 20

    Edit | Reply
    well done!
    this should have trophy upon trophy upon it!
    it is sculpted poetry and each lines
    truly shows poetic beauty and ability!

    It is true that our own NASA space center hires
    artists and poets too...
    to write of the journeys and celestial adventure!

    wouldn't that be fun!
    they should pick you!
    ears/Seattle


  • hitthispuppy
    May 18

    Edit | Reply

    WOW!!

    "while her body was sleeping
    she read a book
    about how to make snow
    the traditional way "-

    it opened up for you softly, like a whisper, or the scent of perfume, not overpowering, but pulling you in closer for more.
    i still feel as if i am floating right along with the words of your poetry.
    Refreshing in every way.
    I will look forword to reading more of your work.


  • Mercury Rising
    May 17

    Edit | Reply
    Very original and spare imagery as well as informative. I have often seen cappachino froth
    when I close my eyes, but this cosmic latte color
    eludes me. Usually it's just black and bitter
    espresso in my mind, and I often long for a
    few drops of cream.


  • SteveS gold member
    May 17
    Edit | Reply
    Very cool poem. And an education about cosmic latte, as well. Great stuff.


  • whitecoffee
    May 17

    Edit | Reply

    very cool

    Yes, congrats on the spotlight and I'm very glad to read it. The color is so cool! This poem totally inspires me, and makes me think I need to work alot harder

  • Topnotchsy
    May 17

    Edit | Reply
    Congrats on having this featured on the front page of the site in the "In the Spotlight" section, I can see why it was chosen. Nice write!!

  • LovingPhoenix
    May 17
    Edit | Reply
    I really enjoyed this! Very beautiful!


  • Raspy
    May 17

    Edit | Reply

    Great poem

    Loved the title,the imagery,
    your construction and the flow. Thats an incredible photograph that enhanced this beautifuly. Nice work!

  • piggyback
    May 17

    Edit | Reply
    "she laid" -- lay?

    This is very good. I loved all the imagery, how you combine concrete human actions with a subtle hint of supernatural (someone who can make snow) and all that.

    "the punctuation of her body -

    waiting" -- awesome image. It also relates very well to "the patience
    of cosmic latte" (very clever and visual phrase, too).


    • silverscent gold member
      May 17
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for that. I always get past and present tense (lie, lay, laid) mixed up

  • Page Deleted.
    May 16

    Edit | Reply
    This is just perfect, especially the second part.

    Best of luck in the contest.

    wintergirl


  • white stone
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    Very trippy and earthbound cosmic...
    Excellent flow and word choice...
    Elegant...
    Like a painter who knows just how many strokes are effective.


  • Cannonsfire
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    If all poetry could be as delicious as this not over obvious latte, I'd read more. I was sent this link by Tomisb and am grateful to him for it. You have a wonderful gift C


  • tomisb
    May 15

    Edit | Reply
    You avoided the obvious and gave instead the richer sublime.
    Each delicate snapshot brought rich rewards to reader who is willing to allow you to be their guide. I would love and entry like this in any contest I had.

    The opening was so full of magic. Woman as goddess, child opening in blossom of the mysteries of woman hood.

    The second sensual and full of the looming tomorrows and loves unspoken with men rough and inexperienced in touching heaven.

    The third is a promise that will steal hearts vulnerable to the promise of a woman who would be all that she can be in the magic of herself.

    This is stunning. I feel honored to read it.

    Love, Tom B.


  • kales411
    May 15
    Edit | Reply
    really really good write
    its very poetic


  • Jeri gold member
    May 11
    Edit | Reply

    EXCELLENT!!

    This is such a cool read. Such a peaceful feel to your words.
    Peace and God's touch
    Jeri


  • Serenity-words
    May 6

    Edit | Reply
    Your prompt
    http://www.britishcouncil.org/arts-art-photography-and-video-sam-taylor-wood-main_picture

1 - 25 of 25