My song is brief, its lyrics filled with woe,
But on sing I in hope that you will hear.
One day perhaps you’ll listen and you’ll know
That losing you had always been my fear.
I never sought to cause your heart to bleed.
I never wished to leave you there alone.
I never looked on you through eyes of greed,
I hoped for you to ever be my own.
But you and distant lives are lost to me.
I must move on and build my life again.
But still sing I my brief song of mis’ry,
Hoping that yours is the lesser pain.
To have you not in my arms my heart burns,
To have you back is for what my heart yearns.
Author notes
Just a quick one i put together for you. it could probably do with a bit of revision when i have some more time.
A contest entry
- A Salute to the Sonnet by Ceridwens Soul.
3000 points, ended June 10, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Ah, this was beautiful; I think so many of us can identify with it also, which I find can be important int h e writing of a poet
Best wishes in the contest; I intend to go and read more of your poetry now!
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Awesome! I loved it!
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I really like this one... It is beautiful and full of senses. It made me remember some of the moments of my life… Thank you for writing such one!
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amazing!!!!! i have no words to describe how truly awesome this was!!!!!!
BRAVO!!!!!!!!!! -
This is absolutely poetry in motion, I totally enjoyed reading this piece, very well written and the feelings are indeed expressed, Great job!!!!!
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A sad verse for a love lost. Perhaps, all in all, it was for the best, A life rebuilt is a life saved,
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NICE
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The woe weaved into such a lovely poem is beautiful.nice write..
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such a bittersweet beauty, for the poem is beautiful yet its one of such deep heartfelt pain. Written superbly as well. What a wonderful write!
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awsome
u have a wonderful write keep up the good work it was awsome
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A beautiful poem, very deep.
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This is a heart wrenching write reflecting the painful side of love. A wonderful poem.
Thank you so much for sharing this in my contest.
~Ceridwen~
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Nice write. You've clearly got a handle on how to use form poetry to your advantage.
In these two lines I didn't really understand why you manipulated the lines and did not just stick to the obvious choice as both "I sing on" and "still I sing" fir the meter.
"But on sing I in hope that you will hear."
"But still sing I my brief song of mis’ry,"
The end of the latter line was also the only place I tripped a bit as the rhythm left the emphasis on "brief" when the content called for it to be on "song."
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Thank you for your entry, good luck
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TOUCHUNG!
Really nice one! I loved it!
Hoping that yours is the lesser pain. - O! what great love you bear in your heart!
very touching! A nice sonnet!
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Thanks. I haven't been on for ages, and i've been focusing on a story i'm working on, so it was nice to get a bit of poetry out!
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