Lonely Ranger

I haven't written in a while
Want to know my life through my eyes?
Just cry
It has become a habit of mine
Life is spinning in circles
I get dizzy just thinking about it

Friends lost
Friends gain
Backs stabbed
Backs healed
I was beginning to feel like I was on top of the world
Till that day
The day I will never forget
Why did it have to happen?
Ask God.
He planned this
And something good will come out of it.

I could look at her today without holding back tears
Even thinking of it makes me want to cry
Her behind me?
I cant deal with that. I want her next to me and him on the other side
But no one gets what they want
Which sucks
I will try
Try even when it gets tough
We will start walking up the other hill
Till we get to the top
We will stay at the top our wholes lives
And never fall
I dont want to fall
I dont care if people joins us but no one can let us fall down it
I wouldn't be able to stand the pain again

I kill myself with a fake gun
If that happens again it might be real
Who and I kidding I could never go through that
Nor would my friends.
Guess that is on good side about my friends
But there are many flaws too.
This poem is crap but I needed to write

People ask "how is life?"
I flat out lie and say "good!"
When it is the exact oppisite
Life sucks
My friends
My Parents
Which by the way isnt getting better
Only
Worse
I just have to remember
God has a plan for my life
thats all I need to know.
goodbye.