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Sleepless

Shadowy figures of the night
the scented lavendar pillow
dazed emotions reach from your sight
yes the pity  has overflowed.

Shallow and deep the heart so weary
and tears they fall in droves
yet sleep is the only peace i have
and this peace is now lost to me.

Author notes

just what are your thoughts to this

is there anyway to improve on this

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • spirit rising
    June 19

    Edit | Reply
    this is great, you have reallly bought it to life, i love how you expressed your emotions within this


  • Sonja
    April 28

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    To write of sleepless night looks like an easy job, but it isn't. In my opinion you poured out your feelings. Honestly, I think that you have done a nice job here.
    ~Sonja~


  • Kiran silver member
    April 26
    Edit | Reply
    Liked this piece, poignant and makes you think! Well written


  • Supa Fox
    April 26
    Edit | Reply
    I like this a lot. It's sad, but not too obviously sad. The rhythm flowed really nicely too.