I was born and raised in Santa Monica, a beach community in Southern California, and grew up trekking down Pico Boulevard to the beach on weekends and listening to Jan and Dean and The Beach Boys on the radio, so I had already decided I wanted to be a surfer, too.
This desire was cemented one Saturday afternoon when I was about twelve years old. I was studying Okinawan karate at the time and class had just ended. A few classmates and I were hanging out in front of "Shakey's", a pizza joint in the same strip mall. It was a popular gathering point for kids and teenagers in the neighborhood. Most young men and women had the same hairstyles then: long and parted right down the middle. "Surfer's Rule" was spray painted on walls just about everywhere, and back then, it was true.
A car pulled into the lot that I would think was tacky now (or maybe not), but at the time, it was by far the coolest car I had ever seen - a 1957 Chevy Nomad painted deep purple with air-brushed constellations all over it. A full-sized Hot Wheel. Man, what a car. Here's one like it -
Surfboards projected from the rear window and fuzzy dice dangled from the rear view mirror. About ten girls ran to the car as it pulled up to talk to the two bleached blonde, sun bronzed surfers in the front seat. Local celebrities.
That did it. As soon as I could afford the small technicalities of a surfboard and a car to get to the beach, I would become a tan, blonde beach bum just like them and the girls would come flocking over to me, cooing with adoration the same way. I practiced my future surfing moves on my "Boss Man" skateboard and followed early skateboard technology from metal wheels to urethane. I still have the scars on my knees to remember the metal ones by, which would come to a screeching halt when they met a pebble of any size, projecting my diminutive pre-pubescent frame five feet ahead, leaving me blowing on my palms, with freshly skinned knees.
The next step in my evolution as a surfer-to-be was a movie in 1978 called Big Wednesday about three California surfers grappling with the difficulties of growing up. Though set in the 60's, it was custom made for me. Jan Michael Vincent was in that one, too, and he made the biggest impression. Here's what he looked like then -
He was the quintessential surfer. The Brad Pitt of the 70's. The actor all other wanna-be movie idols aspired to be.
Finally, I started surfing. Here's what I looked like at about 19 or so.
Yeah, that's me. Mr. Conservative. (I know the Christmas sweater doesn't exactly scream surfer, but I was at the Hollywood Christmas Parade when that photo was taken. Cut me some slack.)
I completely screwed up high school for two reasons -
1. Surfing
2. Girls
I guess it could be said I was studying Oceanography and Anatomy, but the sad fact of the matter is the surfing lifestyle just doesn't lend itself to academic excellence. But I digress.
Jan's character in Big Wednesday had a hard time with the changes growing up demands. He became a homeless drunk. In the movie, he worked his problems out and became a family man. But in real life, he wasn't so lucky. He became an alcoholic and drug abuser, ruined a few marriages, wrapped his car around a telephone pole while driving drunk and sustained a severe neck injury that caused him to medicate himself even more. Here's Jan Michael Vincent today. Brace yourself.
I can't tell you how shocked and saddened I was to see my boyhood hero reduced to such a state. I actually cried.
We all get old. It's unavoidable. But how WELL we age is up to us and every decision we make from moment to moment. Jan made a lot of bad decisions. Now, instead of enjoying a career as an older actor, the adoration of fans, and perhaps still surfing at Malibu, he is disabled, living in seclusion somewhere out of state (nobody really knows where), and probably still drinking himself into oblivion. I hope he has found some peace and is happy with his lot in life, but I'm afraid that's not the case. He seemed profoundly unhappy in the interview the still above was taken from. He expressed a desire to get back into acting but his face was so beaten up from his various addictions, his speech was so slurred, his memory was so bad, and his attitude was so volatile, the chances of him getting work again are very slim.
What do you think he would say if he could travel back in time and have a conversation with his younger self? The kid who had it all? The king of Hollywood? How did drugs and alcohol become more important than everything else he achieved? A bad joke that has persisted in Hollywood is that stars should "live fast, die young and leave a good-looking corpse" like James Dean and Marilyn Monroe did. But that path is even more foolish because no matter how bad life gets, every day is a new chance to start over. As the saying goes, where there's life, there's hope. Jan lived fast, kept on living, and gradually became a crushed man left to meditate on how he threw it all away.
Those of you who know me well here know that I lost my brother and only sibling to a drug overdose. Though still alive, if one could call it that, I also lost my childhood idol, Jan Michael Vincent, to drugs and alcohol.
So what's the point of this trip down memory lane? What I'm trying to say, especially to young people who have been convinced by confused people that drugs and alcohol are just harmless fun, is that it's okay to have a drink once in a while. We don't have to become ascetics, but clearly, we're not supposed to go out like this. We can kill ourselves all at once, or a little at a time, all in the name of avoiding the work we need to do soberly. The "work" is unique to all of us, and only we can identify what it is, and then do it, whatever it takes.
Maybe Jan's finally doing it now. We're all a work in progress.
What about you?
Gold trophy winner
Adding your comment:
I loved reading this. it really took me way back to the days when everyone was someone and life was free and easy...at least looking back it was. People change, Michael had things going on...Some people just can't handle it. I have seen many lives go down the gurgler this way, but what really gets me is the ones that go without the drugs and alcohol. This was a great write and I am bookmarking it so I can come back and read it again as i think there should be more time given to it.
. Well, nearly four years ago now, my brother died from alcoholism. He died in his home, but he easily could have been driving and taken others with him. People don’t realize what terrible diseases alcoholism and drug addiction really are. Your story makes us think. I hope it makes all the kids think and I hope it provides a little bit of catharsis for you. Using Jan-Michael Vincent as an example sure made me think. While he might not have been the best actor in the world, he definitely had his place in the Hollywood elite. Nice job.
