It's one am,
I'm lying here, still
[Drowning in my blood]
Body wracked with pains,
Nature has her way,
[Choking me on tears]
Full moon rises,
From the black of night,
[Still no hope of a dawn]
Can't move.
Can't breathe.
I must endure,
I am strong,
I survive
Even unto the end of eternity,
Though I tear at the seams,
And lose everything I am.
A contest entry
- Titles & Topics!!! plus anything goes. by purplemoon.
953 points, ended May 29, 90 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything by Beating.
550 points, ended May 3, 53 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
The piece is very well worded, and the imagery is very good. Drowning in blood is probably a bit of a cliche. The rest felt strong and original, and I liked it. Good job!
-
Hmmm.......I see no right way to comment on this poem. It isnt Bad don't get me wrong I like it but I can't really say anyhting about it. But that it's a really good poem.
Thanks for the entry.
~kathryn~


