A dark room, a mysterious glow
Proper attire to put on a good show
You sit down in a comfy old chair
The thick smell of incense percolates the air
A deep breath to get into the part
Exchange some money and the session will start
You lost someone quite dear to you
A special one you closely knew
I can feel his or her presence
Does the word "metal" make sense
Your mother was in an accident
I see fire and metal was bent
Is that your mother in a crash
I distinctively see a car in a flash
It happened fast, there was a scream
I can see it like a distant dream
That necklace that you hold quite dear
You use it to keep your mother near
She gladly hands it down
She wants you to loose that frown
She tells me you look good in it
She thinks it is a perfect fit
That is how you remember the session
it all seemed real, left a big impression
But not every statement was really a hit
There were things that did not closely fit
Did you unconsciously nod with your head
Was there something you unknowingly said
Did you smile when she got something right
Showing her the way like a street lamp at night
She gives you what you want to hear
Your emotions and reactions are awfully clear
She keeps on guessing, will sometimes prevail
Though every rigid test she would fail
We all need hope, need to stop in our track
When the universe claims our loved ones back
Time takes them away, leaves nothing but grief
Nothing can stop or imprison this thief
Our memories can serve as a tether
to keep the ones we have lost forever
These charlatans prod and stab at the remains of the dead
Not literally, but at what's inside of our head
Do not give your money to a wretched deceiver
Who exploits and cons the unwary believer
Your memories are precious, keep them close to your heart
Let grief run its course and then make a fresh start
A contest entry
- Anything And Everything! by My Last Breath.x.
1120 points, ended June 4, 65 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I want poems about grief here by trekkergirl.
400 points, ended May 19, 80 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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This is a very interesting and creative write. I do believe that this fits in with what I asked for. I asked for grief and a lot of people do go to fortune tellers to help them find the answers that they need. Good creative write. Thanks for sharing this with us. And thanks for entering it into my contest.
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I think you should go over your spelling, it bothers a lot of readers when things are spelled wrong. I like the last stanza the best, the flow is good and even in most places, maybe re-write it less wordy and see how you like it then, just a suggestion.
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very good flow
with long poems its essential to keep the flow going and you kicked ass at it - a long poem can be hell to read if there is no flow or rhyming scheme - kick ass!


