Grown Up, Yet Still a Child

She stares at the ceiling,
covered by the clouds and dreams of her youth.
She sees past all her foolish ignorence now,
all that love that she gave,
she knows all her acts were in vain.

She listens to the silence,
waiting for some noise to rip through her curtains of solitude,
The sound she wants the most,
the one she know won't come,
because he won't ever call.
Her ears strain,
willing the impossible to happen.

She wishes for some truthfulness for once,
in a world that is so full of lies she doesn't know which way is up.
For once,
she wants him to follow-through on his promises of love,
instead of leaving her deserted in a lonely plane of thought.
She knows she's wishing blindly,
but she can't stop.

She doesn't want to watch the memories from an outside standpoint anymore.
She doesn't want to listen to a voice whispering "I'm sorry" for what he claims to be the last time.
She doesn't want to have to wish for wanting to live another day, she just wants to be able to.

and the phone still won't ring.