I put everything I had into a supernovae brightly blinking in a far away sky.
minutes later; my eyes were blinded evident combustion.
I was deceived by the heavens
into thinking things could be
beautiful without being
prone to
breaking.
- -
I used to cry over cookies
because of the way
I was scared you
were dying.
that gurney that you were rushed to;
holds every fear by body was
incapable of grasping.
- -
I hope you feel
guilt.
Author notes
title taken partially from fall out boy.
i'm so foolish to even enter amongst these amazing writers, but someone has to make them look good.
A contest entry
- for people who have me on their favorites. by winterbound..
600 points, ended May 5, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter all your poems that begin for a number, character or symbol. [series, part 2 of 27] by xxRainbowDawnxx.
600 points, ended June 19, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
if i was improper grammer, would you have the heart to correct me?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This makes me feel so sad. I know someone this would be sort of dedicated to in my life. Passionate and sad, I know the fear and worry for someone who wasn't worthy of it. I hope they feel bad for hurting you and the one who hurt me feeling sorry for hurting me, but I know that'll never happen. He knows nothing about feelings, except anger and lust.
-
This is a beautiful piece of writing.
---
'I was deceived by the heavens
into thinking things could be
beautiful without being
prone to
breaking.'
I love this part it so damn beautiful and relatable
---
'I used cry over cookies
because of the way
I was scared you
were dying.'
I think your missing the word 'to'
----
'I put everything I had into a supernovae brightly blinking in a far away sky.minutes later; my eyes were blinded evident combustion.'
amazing diction in this part
-
"I was deceived by the heavens
into thinking things could be
beautiful without being
prone to
breaking."
That.. Is amazing =)
-
aww you're not foolish you're a great writer.. & your awards demostrate how good you are hunni... I see a couple of typos and missing words... check em out I might be kinda wrong
since Im a bit sleepy 
this is very well done.. the title captivated me and the body seems well thought... good luck!
-
Ooh.
I like this.
I put everything I had into a supernovae brightly blinking in a far away sky.
minutes later; my eyes were blinded evident combustion.
- Those have got to be the most brilliant lines I've seen all day. They're absolutely, tremendously clever.
Gah, this is astounding.
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