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The Styx

I saw father through bar,
and mother through hole
This house is of mirrors
All homes take their toll.

Author notes

My childhood.
Written March 7th, 2004

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    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • vaseline
    February 28, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    You said tit.


  • whoamiamwhom
    September 19, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    well done, makes me think of my own insane family

  • Capital
    September 6, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    hm, quite a lot of complexity that you have managed to pack into four lines...strong form and very well written!


  • horus8 gold member
    May 21, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    What movie? This isn't a movie you tit it's my fucking life.

  • FriendOfYours
    May 21, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Haven't seen the movie...interesting entry, not what I am looking for though, I am sorry.

    Randy


  • poetryality silver member
    May 18, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Simple and soul rendering. Excellent write that gives us a glimpse of your "life"... Good luck with the contest! Hope you're better.

    Much Love,
    Renee

  • horus8 gold member
    March 8, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Bless your heart, did I tell you I was attacked by a spider, and that's why I've been sick, little bastard, got me in my sleep. Left me with the shakes and phantom tonsil swelling.


  • B2oH
    March 8, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Conception, birth and a product of who you are.

    Clever. Simple and yet, couched in superb metaphor. You be da Poet. I am nearly blinded.


  • Naughtygrlred
    March 8, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I read this earlier but I did not comment, but i get it jeremi you are the the one

  • Flagrancy
    March 8, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    hmmmmmmmm...this just leaves me thinking. Interesting write.


  • kitty-cat81897
    March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    This poem is short, but I like it! I watched that movie before! I don't know what else to say...lol!
    truly,
    kitty


  • horus8 gold member
    March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    keyhole, squarehole in the ground vagina hole, hole in the head on and on and on etc...


  • March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Short and stunning. I love it.


  • TrinityMBS silver member
    March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    wow... I haven't seen that movie, but there is just something about this piece that hits me over the head and says bonk leave him a message! This is awesome... perfect rhythem and it SEEMS that it might be packed with meaning... the beginning is a little confusing to me... the holes part... but I love that last line... "This house is of mirror All homes take their toll"... awesome!
    Trin


  • March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    hhhhmmmm, very interesting poem, ive only seen a very little of road to perdition so i cant tell lol, ive been told that i need to watch all of it, anyways, i thought this poem sounded really good, thanks for sharing


  • horus8 gold member
    March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I just watched road to Perdition again, can you tell?

  • fallen-angels
    March 7, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Mmmm. Ok. Yeah. I like that. I certainly find some meaning in it. Confusing meaning. But its there. And its definitly cool. Nicely done.

1 - 17 of 17