emotional naivety
is etched into her trust,
a paper-weight to steady narrow skin
as it breaks open, unfolding toward less harrowing
geometries of sin
~
inside remains intact enough
to covet some tomorrow, yet viably transparent
so that too-real moments are able to pass
unnoticed,
unlike the fake memories she wishes
were real-
invisible tattoos drawn inside-out
Author notes
Edits: 4
Wordcount: 59
A contest entry
- paper thin by Saffron.
1100 points, ended May 11, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)
Comments
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I’m with the others here—the ending here is very strong. I particularly like the whole notion of fake memories—we all have them, don’t we...
In the first stanza, is “naivity” spelled correctly?
I loved this, as I always do of your work. Thank you so much for entering this.
Saffron
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It was - thanks for the catch
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Your ending line was hard hitting and so powerful,
Gold's taken.
Best of luck!
Sophie.
x -
the two ending lines... so good. i always love your poetry.
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