Defined by splinter kissed lead- and sprinkled with paper scratches, I always wanted to be a ballerina. Tutu dancing allowed to be different colors even if just for auditorium seat performances.
I've always hated the colors yellow, brown and grey. The mirror shows me clouds when I want to be raindrops, and it paints me as cobblestone when my irises long to be fern trees and overgrown cement grass.
I don't know what suicidal means only that I want to be something else. Is that murder if my prickly spine dreams of giving up its form for being spineless and transforming into something I was never meant to be?
I'm not afraid of drowning because often my eyes clench shut with aquamarine jaded calm, and my mouth is filled with grape juice or spilled drinks in binder suffocating backpacks. But someday I wish to be reborn as a mermaid- free and not defined by corrupted angelic words.
I don't think I'm ordinary- because I don't fear physical pain, I'm used to cutting. Nicks are etched into my skin every day by paper shavings and my heart just pumps more inanimate blood.
Fire scares me- flames melt me and then I become nothingness, not even a tool for words that I'll never be credited for, even though I'm the artist that formed them.
Fire devours my shaving lungs and dead tree livers- that's all I'm scared of, becoming nothing.
I have years before I'm whittled into paper thin life, centuries before the drowning suffocates me and eternal seconds before weird labeling words human use like 'suicidal' ever mean anything to me.
I'm only afraid of fire.
Author notes
20/150
pencil
A contest entry
- Amaranthine Lover's Getting Rid of Some Points Again! by amaranthine lover.
2600 points, ended May 17, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - If a Pencil Had a Soul... by Nienna Calmcacil.
600 points, ended May 2, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ANYTHING GOES!! PIF by Jade.Butterfly.
2000 points, ended April 23, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your best. by abmsem.
1000 points, ended April 27, 171 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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17.3/25
I liked this, but I felt that it did drag on a bit too long. And quite a few of your images were rather run-on and I had a hard time keeping straight what I was supposed to be experiencing. Might want to go back and take a closer look at this. -
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What were the strong points if any so I can center on that and take out the parts that don't add? Thank you for your crittique, I do plan to revise this
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I would definitely take out the word "suicidal." It tends to be a rather overused word for our age group and I feel that you are a bit beyond that stage. Lemme get back to you on this. I'd like to reread it again and absorb more of what you had intended.
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Ok I only used it since I didn't know how to describe how a pencil might want to be a different form.
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That's when just taking that idea and you just puzzle over it. Let it come to you. A thesaurus is always an awesome source to find a different word to help move your writing along.
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Remember, these are just mere suggestions and not meant to take offense.
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I loved the last line. It all ties in beautifully. Thank you and good luck
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WoW!
Some great imagery you have here.
Very heartfelt and emotional. I felt the sadness in your words.
great piece.
Good luck in contest and thanks for entering
-Mandi -
this is good but I have to delete you, I can't hace suicidal in my contest , this is very heartfelt though
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Excellent. Beautifully written. Great perspective for a pencil...and I loved your metaphors--they were gorgeous.
Thank you for entering... -
labeling
-Spelt wrong.
This poem is fantastic. I very much hope you win =]
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