Cold and unforgiving-
This crag
This garden of stone and brine
A wasteland among Green Paradise
Locked in eternal mist.
The echoes of salt ground against stone
Harkens this soul to a place once called home.
Nearly five years 'tween Eden and I
And yet returning, youthful eyes do see
The briny shallows at Nature's heart-
Stone castles built upon monolith shores-
A whisper soft and fleeting on high winds-
"...I'm home again..."
Again to walk the shore I left
Alone but sky and sea
The weak one returned to the place
Where once she drew her strength.
This place of splendor
Is anything but grand to unworthy and untrained eyes
Its grandeur lies in silent solitude-
The thoughtfulness it brings.
Returning back to watch time pass
Seems hardly what I should be doing
But such longing to retrace the footsteps
I left seems the more feasible of options.
A peace washes over
Sudeen as a thunderstorm only to overcome and astonish.
I wonder while my body wanders the once familiar shore-
Minute moons shift in the murky nighttime with dancer grace-
Moving effortlessly with each ebb and flow.
A painted sky- stained bands of slate and cream hang lazily in the late noon warmth
Leaving the sun in inspiring suspension-
Providing bold streaks of citron against the fishbone heavens.
Author notes
Part of an assignment for my high school English class. I felt that "Tides" was something that I should post before I turned it in. The assignment was to write a poem similar to Wordsworth's famous ode to Tintern Abbey. An honest opinion would be greatly appreciated. :]
How would you grade this?
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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I really like the vivid starkness of your muse's awesome words; the crashing sounds of the sea, the echo of times' past in misty remembrances, the love for the land of your birth, and the surreal imagery within your lovingly penned metaphors. I could feel and smell the salty sea winds, and I felt the same longing to become whole again, upon the long-lost shores of one's own homeland. Thank you for sharing this beautifully mesmerizing, poetic masterpiece!! 
I'm wishing you all the best!! 
Peace, xx Cyn xx
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this is great! good luck with your assignment at school. I think you will get some really positive feedback here. let us know what kind of grade you get. thanks for sharing. peace to you always in all ways...
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the imagery works really well you paint a lovely picture i love this idea of experancing something all over again i cant see many akward parts i think this will go down well
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This is so wonderful. I loved it. Very serene and peaceful. Very beautiful write. It was a Pleasure to read.
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Superb Plus
'tis a fine write, indeed, with excellent imagery. You express your thoughts quite well. Thanks for sharing this on.
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Excellant!
I am not familiar with Wordsworth's work. But, this is a beautiful write. You should receive an "A". Let me know how you do!
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