I lie in scalding water- hoping that the burning will turn the lead weights into ashes on my pin feathers so I can become lighter than I ever was- as light as a feather.
ii
Nowadays I'm always cold- and my fingertips brush my shins and can't tell if there's a trail of goose bumps or its rough because of stray hairs I missed.
Hugging warm sweatshirts to my chest, needing them to fill me full of hot air so it can melt away the solid ice particles formed into my lungs, the choking snowflakes coating my razor blade lungs.
iii
Slowly, as I've tried to melt myself away- I've become consumed by heating up my sea wall pinfeathers- so maybe one of these days when my swing set wings pump themselves into the air- I could actually fly.
Wings pounding, without a conscience - never coming back.
I'll take grungy wings over crippled humming bird wings- weighed down by sorrow and scales and lip gloss colors of cremaline.
iv
Maybe the water could burn away everything of me except my wings- my heartbeats, the cadences of my breaths in razor blade lungs and my bonfire soul.
But I've formed a tolerance for the heat- for scalding hot water- I get three seconds of extreme heat, fading the the pain and forcing it back. Then I'm done.
v.
Maybe some humans aren't meant to fly.
Author notes
17/150
writingfreedom
A contest entry
- Make My Heart Ache by AshesFromFire.
900 points, ended April 16, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - you are a little bit happier than i am (prose) by Diseased Mind.
400 points, ended April 16, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Assisted Self-Harm (picture, song, and idea prompts) by LovelyTraces.
2100 points, ended June 13, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
This is also very impressive, but now that I know your full potential ( ) I feel that I have to point out some things:
I don't particularly love that you used the phrase 'razor blade lungs' twice in this poem. When people use things like that twice, they become a little cliche'. I'd suggest rewording one of them.
Also, along the same lines, in part ii, you used 'lungs' right before 'razor blade lungs'. I'd suggest changing the first 'lungs' to 'throat', so that it doesn't get too repetitive.
Other than those 2 things, I really am impressed by this. Again, exactly the kind of entries I want. :]
Let me know if you go back and do any editing. -
Maybe Some Humans Arent Meant To Fly
Now that, is exactly the kind of thing I was looking for in this contest!
That line hits the heart!
That line drives you crazy!
That line makes you catch you breath
and think for a minute!
Well done
Good luck in my contest -
Maybe some humans aren't meant to fly.
- I LOVE how this is relating to the line earlier in the poem. Honestly this is such a great poem. I love reading your work so much
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