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Questions……

Did you think of my feelings when you ripped out my heart?
Or were you just planning this right up from the start?
Was it hard to pretend when you showed me devotion?
Or were you just laughing when I shared my emotion?
Am I the only person who’s life you have destroyed?
Or have you made others feel this shattered and devoid?
Why wont you answer me and please just explain?
Or is this still part of your sick little game?


Can you tell me one thing while your still in my head?
Are all my thoughts wrong for wishing you dead?

What did you think

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Ami
    July 6

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    Fucking awesome I've felt this way about a guy before but now he's a friend again I guess some people do change.. Great write! thank you so much for entering my contest and good luck -♥Amy♥


  • Cyanide Dreams
    May 6

    Edit | Reply

    68

    Title: 9/10
    Originality: 6/10
    Emotion: 6/10
    Grammar/Spelling: 6/10
    Flow/Structure: 7/10
    Imagery: 5/10
    Overall Use of Poetic Devices: 6/10
    Reaction: 6/10
    Rules: 10/10
    Overall: 7/10
    Totaling: 68/100

    This piece didn't get to me at all. I really liked the questions, but I think you can do so much more with this piece. I think you could elaborate and do so much with this piece. Try answering the questions poetically but use metaphors and intensify the imagery to spice it up. I think that this piece could really go somwhere. Thanks for entering and good luck in the contest.

    Josh


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    April 27

    Edit | Reply
    the rhyming in this is pretty good. i wish you the best of luck in this contest that you have entered and thank you for sharing this with me today. viyanna rosemarie


  • Kelsey-Jo silver member
    April 21
    Edit | Reply
    This poem follows a very traditional style all the way through: AABBCCDD... rhyme scheme, ending in a couplet, several cliches. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, it's just not what I'm looking for in this contest.

    Thank you for taking the time to enter & God bless,

    K-J

  • Ami
    April 15
    Edit | Reply

    this is really deep

    and although its short..
    you got the point out right away
    Great Write and
    Thank You for entering my contest
    Good Luck
    -♥Amanda♥


  • Sparkle The Pirate
    April 14
    Edit | Reply
    no I'd think not. I like this one too. I feel anger !!! *growl* lol *chin up*


  • Flowergirl
    April 13

    Edit | Reply
    very nice work the flow is very nice i can see where you are coming from this is great work keep it up....

1 - 10 of 10