i'll just have one drink i say
knowing it to be false
drink up i yell
thinking i'm the life of the party
but then i look up..... i'm alone
so my one more drink turns to 2
as it burns down my throat
traveling to my liver i feel a temporary relief
but relief turns to sadness
and the sadness turns to need
so i grab the bottle
and 2 turns to 3
my eyes turn heavy and tears start to poor
just me and my bottle on the floor
as three drinks turn to four
thoughts of what i dreamed for as a kid
to help people, to be something big
cut deep into my soul torturing me
so i put the bottle to my lips
as four turns to five
the pain only gets worse so i run from my demons
with my six and seventh drink
reality is slipping but so is my heart
my God what have i become
i've torn myself apart
i tell myself i'll change tommorrow
as i take my eighth and ninth drink
to bad i won't remember today
so tommorrow i will sink
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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but relief turns to sadness
and the sadness turns to need
so i grab the bottle
and 2 turns to 3
i loved these lines the most...I think because I could relate so well to them. great job here poet. I expect you will get some great feedback. -
great stuff
been there, done it...still doing it......it aint easy...you tell it as it is with honesty and
passion........great poem.....done well and well done....
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Well written and good story, kept me there. I hope it's not from personal experiences?
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well...
unfortunately it is from personal experiences i'm getting better... slowly...
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Brilliant
I can relate to this, brilliant potrayal of what alchohol can do to you. The only thing I will say is - Capital letters, where are they? Lol. Other than that - awesome piece, I really did enjoy reading and relating.
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Awesome
I loved it, really been there ;P Excellent way of writing and I really wanted to read on
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ooh i like how you kept using turn. great repitiition. works reall well
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well I'm cheering/praying for you recovery. . .
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This is amazing
I love how you put our need to forget and be lost into this.
It flowed wonderfully
Thank you for sharing.
Keep the ink flowing
fire
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