i take these pills
all different colors shapes and sizes
to put on a mask
one of my many disguises
chew em up and swallow
bitter
but not as bitter as my soul
reality slips and i fall to my own little world
a false perception of happiness
am i even fooling myself
wondering if i'm loved one minute
as i feel total bliss in the next
tears roll down my face
and dance down to the floor
i feel as if i'm melting
down to nothing
because when i do this
that's what i become
absolutly nothing
nothing but a washed up addict
waiting for his next escape from reality
to melt away the problems
to wash away the hurt
but it only creates more agony
as the waves come over me
gentle and first more intense as the clock ticks
tick tock tick
getting paronoid, is this real
am i safe
tick tock tick
am i in my own skin
is this me or is this you
....................
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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man,this is an intense poem.
but i loved it
you portrayed addiction so well as it was clear but not overpowering in the piece.
well done on such an amazing write.
bianca melody
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i liked this piece because it was veri provocative. the beat, flow, feel . . . they all draw the reader into the emotional response of the piece. The feeling of the clock ticking away the time that the addict has left, and also the paranoia . . . almost a reference to the beating of the heart in Poe's tell tale heart. This was not only creative but successfulli hearth breaking. Well played!
i also thought that discussing the pills and their physical representations added a lot to the piece because people who are addicted to prescription meds like oc's and such are usualli more than fairli certain what they are getting . . . x never does quite look the same does it . . .and you never quite know what you are getting with it . . . 2 parts meth . . . 1 part whatever . . . maybe even no parts mdma. veri well done.
<3
Makae Mae
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good point
yeah x is pretty risky... it's a gamble everytime, you don't know if your going to be happy, sad, or even extatic.. it's a rough drug i wish i never got into... but it happens and i'm trying to work my way out of it...
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i take these pills
all different colors shapes and sizes
to put on a mask
one of my many disguises"
Nice rhyme here. that deffinitly caught my eye.
&& the ending. really liked the ending aswell. -
Mmm I love the intensity in this piece,
and the last lines are just divine <3
You should make this into a song,
do you play any instruments?
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lol i do play instruments
yeah i play guitar and sing in a metal band called "I googled murder' and i never thought of turning this one into a song but it would be pretty great... i'm gonna try it thanks for nudging me into the idea!!! -
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It would be a great song
[and btw that's an awesome band name!!
]
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lol we finally finished the song and it's pretty schweet.. we played it at our show yesterday and the kids loved it!!!
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awesome, wish i could've heard it
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Superb Plus
A very fine dark write, indeed. You have expressed your thoughts quite well. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
sigh, oh Tim. poetic words.... describing such things. My heart goes out to you....
and I find myself in that familiar place, of knowing I can't really do a thing but say that I still care and that I'm praying for you.
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it's not a hopeless struggle by any means... i try and am doing better i've been drug free for about 2 months and i'm happle but it doesn't mean i don't crave... the only way i can shake the cravings is to write about the pain they give... it's whats been working... so yeah that's why this is on here
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-hugs-
wow this is a really great poem. makes me worry about you. but its a good poem.
im here if you need to want to or can talk
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