beautiful pastel-y rainbow pearls
spell my honeycomb name in the silver sky
and you whisper sweet major chords in my ear.
i dream of being next to you--
i dream of light purple moments like this.
you fill my empty soul with color
you fill the unbearable noise with that pastel pink silence that i long for.
i cherish these bright yellow days
when we can sit on that old creaky dock
and softly graze our ivory toes
across the sparkling, comforting water.
i dream of times when we'll get caught in the navy blue rain
and when you'll give me your comfy gray jacket
and gently murmur silky i love yous
into my ebony hair.
i love it when you get lost in my messy hair
when your loose fingers wind up tangled
and we can just laugh bright orange laughs.
i love you
Author notes
i like coloursssss
A contest entry
- Strawberry Blonde. by coloringmysenses.
400 points, ended May 17, 7 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your best prewrites by Blue-Rose Beauty.
500 points, ended April 23, 49 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
rubber bands?
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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wow
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thank you!
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one word:
a.m.a.z.i.n.g.
:]
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wow this is amazong.
stunning write. -
Wow. This poem just puts me in such a beautiful mood. Like, you're floating and just watching a gorgeous day pass you by. I love how light and loving this entire piece is - definitely reflects who you are. I adore the colors... I think that's what really brings out the emotions.
My favorite part:
spell my honeycomb name in the silver sky
and you whisper sweet major chords in my ear.
Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest! (: -
aww
That is soo cute, I love all the lovely imagery, good luckkk! *hugs*
Ollie
xxx
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This formed a perfect, energetic little bubble in my chest.
Your wording and imagery is so effing beautiful, it's completely captivating.
'i dream of being next to you--
i dream of light purple moments like this.'
Aaaaaa, goosebumps.
You are one heck of a writer!
<3
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Predy colors!
The way you made the simple things in life, beauties, and showed each moment is rar. A nice happy poem (not too many hear)
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Absolutely breathtaking
This was soo sensitive, light, and sweet! I found myself smiling through every line
I love the repetition of the colors throughout the piece.
"i dream of being next to you--
i dream of light purple moments like this."An incredible twist of words that made me somewhat sad. I just love the way you worded that, it was amazing :]
"i cherish these bright yellow days
when we can sit on that old creaky dock
and softly graze our ivory toes
across the sparkling, comforting water."This image right here was perfect and incredibly intense. I could really picture a boy and a girl sitting on a dock in the sunshine with nothing around them but water and silence.
Ahhh, you're an exceptionally talented writer, please don't stop, this was beautiful♥
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wow! thank you so much!
that means so much to me. -
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You are welcome
<3
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Oh wow.
I sincerely think i fell in love with your poem. Seriously, never stop writing. EVER. (: great work here! -
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thank you!
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This was absolutely amazing! I loved it! Great write!
I like colors, too. -
Beautiful usage of colors, a delightful read, it sets a heart a dancing. Blessings.
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That was very good.
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thank you!
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I really like the use of color in the poem. This was so beautiful. This poem made me visualize everything. Good luck in the contest.
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i like the way you brought me through every color and it's corresponding emotion. i saw every color and felt every emotion. really good. light purple moments and pastel pink silence. these were great lines. and who can't relate to those two feelings. "graze out toes across....." did you mean "our"? thanks for the great read.
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thank you!:]
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jacket*
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i felt like the colours were just strewn in there for you.
-and when you'll give me your comfy gray jacket-
comfy seems such a common word to describe a jack. i would have loved it if you found another way to describe it.
it was great but i felt like it could have used some tweaking.
good job and good luck.
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this was gorgeous. i felt like some of the 'colour' moments were a bit forced, but "purple moments" and "bright orange laughs" were brilliant.
good write. -
wow, takes on a whole new perspective, I love this rainbow description of color! Each line is a new shade, great job!
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I can honestly say that I've never read anything like this before. I love your descriptions, very nice... and nothing that I have ever seen before.
((I would like it if you capitalized your 'i's though... That would make me happy, but is not needed, of course))
It is still wonderful either way... Kinda trippy. Haha
Sweet, sweet poem you have here, dear... -
So very beautiful lass.......
sweet and soft poetry..
a soulful poem
for your days
in the sun together....
i really enjoyed how articulately incorporated color
in well place portions of the poem....
Gives a joyful good feeling when read.
Excellent!
enjoyed this,
Lowell Poe
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Life is full of colors, and I think you've chosen yours wisely for the poem. It was fun to read, and now there's a rainbow of images splashed across my mind.... The only little thing that bothered me was the repetition of the word "hair" in the final stanza. Maybe "tresses" or "locks"??? Overall, good job, and good luck in the contest.
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overall i like this...
but it has a middle school feel to it.
i wish, that you used the colours differently..
they just seem thrown in there.
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twinnieee! ♥
i love this! ♥
i am dazzled. so much.
'i dream of times when we'll get caught in the navy blue rain
and when you'll give me your comfy gray jacket
and gently murmur silky i love yous
into my ebony hair.'
ebony hair is so pretty.
♥
just like you.
♥
i adore your prose, twinnie.
love youuu.
♥
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