The salty smell tantalizes my senses
The breeze blows my hair
Your scent covers it all
I can be a million miles away
And somehow your scent finds me
It invades my dreams
Gives me thoughts of you
You have hurt me so bad but no matter how much I try
I can never forget you
I cover your face with pictures of broken hearts
I cover your smile with a dieing sun
Your smile used to hold the warmth of the sun
Now I wish the sun would die
every time I see it, I see you
I look for the dark sun spots to mask my hurt
Maybe if it dies, so will what you did to me
Your laugh sent my stomach into convulsing little flips,
Now it sends my stomach into aching pains,
I remember you all to well,
I remember your touch all to much
I don’t remember a time when I didn’t rely on you
I don’t remember a time when I could pick up the pieces all on my own
I don’t remember a time before you
But I’m making a time after you
I don’t need you to pick up my pieces
I don’t need you to hold me together
And when I am alone at night
I don’t need you to comfort me
I am my own person now
I am my own anchor
If anyone is gonna hold my life together its gonna be me
I turn oceans on my tongue and yet, my pen spews not a drop of that depth.
Author notes
this is written for my mom, she is dating a total jackass and she disserves better so i thought that this would help her
A contest entry
- I need boy help!!! by EternallyAlone.
548 points, ended October 20, 18 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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this doesn't fit just your mom, believe me! I love this poem!! fits me... oh, more than I can write!
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This is very deep, if you catch my drift. Sorry, no pun intended. I really like this poem Kari, You did a great job.
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this helps me, I got out of an awful relationship myself not long ago(its been about 9 months), this is great write, I really really like it. <3
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im glad it helps you, i try to help as many people i can through my writing. even if it doesnt always help myself.
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I tend to do that myself.
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You have a wonderful talent
with words...imagery and emotions well penned!
Best wishes in life...and always! You have a lot of knowledge for one your age!
Write on and on and on!
and
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i really loved this all of it was amazing and it was really well written, amazing!!! hope things are ok
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ok first of AMAZING! I think this is my favorite of the ones ive read of yours so far!
My favorite lines:
"i cover your face with picture of broken heart, I cover your smile with a dieing sun"
"i dont remember a time when.....then But I'm making time after you" the ending to thats great!
the ending line is also great! you are awesome. hope this works out the best it can for you!
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Get it gurll! That's right you hold your own life together-no one else1 btw-it was a great poem!
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written boldly..and I beg to differ
your pen spills plenty depth and ocean might!
ears/Seattle
way to write
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i really love this poem lol its so sweet and i love the way its written. AWESOME!!!
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i love this
i wish i could be as good as you
my favorite part was
"i am my own person now
i am my own anchor"
i love it
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I don’t need you to pick up my pieces
I don’t need you to hold me together
And when I am alone at night
I don’t need you to comfort me
this is so how feel about my mom and i am almost 44. thank you for sharing this with me today. i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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im sorry this is so late
idk if i have replied to you or not, but i really enjoyed hearing your comment on my poetry, it really makes me happy knowing that my poetry can relate to people of all ages. thank you.. and i hope to hear from you soon.. -
thankyou
Thankyou for the lovely comment, it is great to have someone read your poetry and be able to relate to it and find something in their life that it can help somehow. That's what I write for, thankyou again and I hope you enjoy reading more of my poems ill be sure to look into yours as well -
thanktou
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I cover your face with pictures of broken hearts
I cover your smile with a dieing sun
They were my favorte lines in the poem. Lots of detale was put into this and it is amazing. Wonderful poem!
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this is really good. and ms. nanke would be so proud. "That's an extended metaphor!!" lol. kudos. but who is she datin??
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