Looking so pretty standing there,
disrobing clothes from your body for me alone to see.
I have bought and paid for you so tonight you belong to me.
The heights that I could take you,
the lows you’ll wish never to feel again,
as all that I feel for you is nothing less than disdain.
Why must you look like her?
The one that left me broken and so cold?
The way your body moves,
taunting me,
calling forth memories, harsh stories better left untold.
It may not be fair,
that’s not for you to say.
For all that she had done to me,
all the anger,
hatred,
it is with your body that the price will be paid.
Walking down the sidewalks,
sex appeal enticing strangers in from the street.
Haggling over the price,
for an hour or two your body will fulfill their needs.
Bringing them in close,
making each feel as if they were the only one,
tonight your body betrayed you for this simple deceit.
You remind me of her,
all the pain and fear,
as she turned away with a disgusted sneer.
With darkness consuming me,
tonight isn’t about play.
Tonight you are merely my unwilling prey.
Author notes
http://images.quickblogcast.com/45737-41649/Darkside_2.jpg
sorry this isn't that good but the few times i have done dark writes have been by accident and plus i found this in my e mail today...
My dearest shimmer,
I am writing this from the sunny beach of Florida. It is spring break and you really didn’t expect me to write a dark poem for you now did ya? Hey girl, what can I say but you are on your own in this round and who knows since I like it so much here I may have to skip a few more rounds this challenge. Hopefully the judges will show some mercy on ya and make the rounds easy till I decide to come back.
Hannah the muse
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Excellent write here. You really captured the darkness and the erotic all together. I think you should tell your muse that you do not need her since you are very good without her...lol
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Mistress Rose
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Well as far as your dark writing goes I suggest you leave your muse in Florida - you can do a super job on your own.
I love the feel of this piece - the sense of vengeance is delicious, yet you have managed disturbingly erotic.
An excellent take on the prompt - certainly not an easy one.
Well done
Jem
Your score has been sent to the challenge host
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ROFL at the muse's message!!!!!
I am happy to see that you rose to the challenge and came out with a piece that is not only decent but deliciously dark as well. Writing without the muse is one hell of a job and I am happy to see that you have done it without her help. lolol
There is great work on the darkness of this piece and I love the take you took on the pic. The imagery in the words alone bring a great translation of the mindset of the woman on the bed. Keep it up.
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First off, I gotta give you an A for effort with your authors note in there..very cute.
I think you did an excellent job giving a dark feel to this picture. There is definately some anger and some dark emotion being portrayed as well.
I think with this piece you have truely showed how dominant you can be in these challenges when you want to be..
BTW tell Hannah they won't be getting any easier..the FINAL round is next.
**Master Ktulu**
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