Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Sonnet "On the New Simony"

 

Derision set in sweet accepting jew’ls,
The lure of being cleansed of sin is strong,
Does bait the weak of will, the blinded fools
Bequeath their pennies, making right of wrong.
Alchemical the state of Law, it seems,
The mere exchange of cash transfuses shame:
The mad reports that numbered in the reams--
A miracle!-- are spotless now of blame.
The followers of traitors spread their word:
A virus that millennia have not slain,
A drunken reverie of the absurd,
A vow of pleasure turned to Hellish pain.
  They peddle Gods like sports cars with no guilt,
  And languish in proud castles sheep have built.

Author notes

Obviously this is not an indictment of an entire religion, only certain peddlers of it.  There was a time when simony was not only frowned upon by Mother Church, but was an offense that incurred the tortures of the Inquisition.  One almost wishes to go back to those days when a slick-haired charismatic salesman preaches on television.

Again, I'm not attacking the entire structure of the religion.  Not only would that be pretentious, but pointless.  So enjoy, please.

Oh, one more point.  The structure of this poem necessitates having to pronounce "millenia" as "mil-LEN-nya", with three syllables, so I don't expect to see comments like "line 10 has eleven syllables!"

Thanks!

- Giovanni
Written March 4th, 2004

In a list

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • Ladie Lee
    March 10, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    very good

    I'm very relidgous but I can't say I'm offended by this poem, in fact I'd agree with it. People go to churchs that have the best "sundy school" or "Playgroud" or whatever. That isn't a way to God it's a way to get rid of your kids for an hour. And the church leaders are as much to blame for their greed. I can't imagine God apprciates being used as a sales tactit. Well I got that off my chest, anyway. I was facinated by your style and use of words. especially the last line was beautiful. It made me think, they make these lovely churches but inside them they are no closer to God than in a smoke filled basement. I always like how you manage to say somthing thats been said in a way that not only makes your point but is captivating, so basically I don't think your poems are shit.
    Really love the write.
    Curtain
    Ladie


  • Fire-Pistil
    March 6, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    well i liked your poem but again im kind of intimidated seeing as how i have nothing constructive or of anyvalue to say. i agree that people

    " peddle Gods like sports cars with no guilt,"

    and i hate that. you shouldnt treat your god like a vacuum cleaner.. i need to put a sighn on my door that says "no religious soliciting"


  • TrinityMBS silver member
    March 4, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Wow... my goodness this is QUITE a sonnet... you really know how to express yourself with these... AMAZING.
    Stephi


  • horus8 gold member
    March 4, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow, this is a mighty sonnet.
    Totally brilliant.


  • iced-rose
    March 4, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I like this work it is great and well spoken even if i am not of that particular religious belief. It is a great approach and it is very well put.

1 - 5 of 5