Once upon a midnight scary,
While I pondered over very
Pornographic Swank and Cherry
Smut rags on the floor,
While I pondered, right hand wrapping
Round my cock, there came a tapping,
As of someone rudely rapping
At my motel door.
Ah, quite clearly I remember,
It was in that dark December
When I pulled upon my member,
With porn mags on the floor;
Eagerly I sought some action,
I was seeking satisfaction,
From my smut, when just a fraction
I opened up the door.
And right then I was quite certain
That my balls would not be hurten
And I quickly would be squirten
Like no time before;
So that now, to calm the beating
Of my heart, I stood there bleating
To the escort I was greeting,
"Are you from dial-a-whore?"
Deep into her dark eyes peering,
Long I looked there, wondering, fearing
If she wore a pussy ear-ring,
Had nipples pierced and more;
When the silence then was broken
By the sexy words then spoken
By the escort who was smoken
Who whispered, "I’m Lenore."
Back into my dark room turning
With the babe who had me yearning
For some really wild and burning
Sex till I was sore;
I was horny, but was praying
She not see the smut rags laying
On the floor where I was playing
With my dick before.
And then this babe began beguiling
My sad fancy into smiling,
By disrobing and un-piling
The wild hair that she wore;
She said: "They call me Mistress Raven,
And if you're the kind who’s craven
Women who are shorn and shaven,
You’re welcome to explore."
Much I marveled how she plainly
Spoke about her pussy mainly,
Until I was just so insanely
Horny for a score;
And with all her tempting taunting,
How she had me wildly wanting
Her hot body she was flaunting,
That kind you can’t ignore.
And when she said the clock was ticking,
That’s when two tongues started flicking,
They started lapping up and licking
Down on the motel floor;
But she was such a practiced master,
It was an absolute disaster,
Because I quickly came much faster
Then I had come before.
And while she lay there with my soaking
Flaccid cock that she was stroking,
And spit out sperm that had her choking
When it commenced to pour,
She looked to me like she was scorning
The way I’d given her no warning,
Before I shot my wad adorning
Her chin and cheeks and more.
For though I’d given her my blessing,
No gratitude was she expressing,
And while I watched her quickly dressing
And heading for the door,
She only turned and grabbed the money,
And didn’t seem to find it funny
When I said: "Come again soon, honey?"
She just quoth, "Nevermore!"
Author notes
An obvious pornographic parody of Poe's 'The Raven'.
A contest entry
- .:TURN ME ON (make me blush):.(get some points) by Minstrel-Morose.
550 points, ended April 4, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - COME ONE COME ALL ADULT/EROTIC WRITERS by Serenity-words.
1800 points, ended July 7, 77 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Funny, perverted drug addicts & other prompts by ladylyric.
800 points, ended June 30, 17 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Inspired by Poe or Byron? Write about it! by The Fun House.
1050 points, ended July 18, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I would say this is a saucey parody indeed
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This has to be, by far, one of the most clever poems that I have read in a long time!! I loved it from beginning to end! Not only was it hilarious, but turning a classic Poe poem into such a dirty piece of work was fucking brilliant! I will be checking out more of your work. Thank you so much for entering!
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Oh my this is crazyly amazing
You did a fabulous job
Favorite line
"Are you from dial-a-whore" lol
Amazing
~Serenit -
You are a fucking genius. I love this. I am gigging insanely as I type. Bravo!
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lol, that's frickin' hilarious. Poe inspired me to write poetry in the first place, when I was 7. I bookmarked this, very clever parody...
Also, though, prewrites are only open in the contest to see if people actually read the entire prompt.
Please enter a new poem, and make it worse than this.
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Wowo this was GREAT. Totally sexy and humiliatingly hilarious. I really really loved it and you totally did make me blush by the way. Thank you for your entry.
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wow.....no comments till judgement but....wow
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