Thunder, thousands of
Butterfly wings break my heart:
Your eyes pause on mine.
Author notes
I'm trying this out.
Comments
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Brilliant haiku - and on your first try, too!
Emol, how do you do it?! This was wonderful! I can't believe how well you express feelings way deep inside that most of us don't attempt to describe. (I'd be embarrassed to anyway - plus, in my case it only gets me grief from people - people like you, come to think of it!!) But really, I loved this. It was exquisite.
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I am very touched that you like it! I doubt it's as good as you think, but thank you for the love
That's what sisters are for anyway, right?
Why don't you try to write one? It's fun!
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I put this through babelfish and you know what Emi"...it came out perfect...word for word, lol Sorry, bad humor.
Even small things can build up until it is deafening, or can feel like a great weight. The last line is interesting because for me it is ambiguous...what does it mean...is it a scathing or a hopeful look? The poem's meaning hinges on that look...for me anyway.
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Wow! Babelfish got it right for once!!!
I wanted the last line to be ambiguous. It can be either hopeful or hopeless, or both.
Thank you for your (always) thoughtful comments!!
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beautiful
I wish I could write haiku too
you've manage to incorporate synesthesia here
and the ending got me...point-blank
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Thank you estbelle!
I'm really pleased you liked it. And I wish you would try a haiku, I'm sure it would be good!! I think it's fun to try different styles.
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