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with and without you

I come to you with an open heart
but with your love I dont know where to start.

I come with an open mind
for I hope the real me you can find.

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

  • jenniferrforshey
    March 30
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    ok for short

    pretty good write for a shorty. my favorite was the rhyming scheme my worst was there could have been more. I relate because this was my write. it made me think of an ex boyfriend. to revise them poem would be after the contest is over to add way more to it. I think the use of the title and first line and last line all kinda fell intogether. i think it went well together.I come with an ope mind for the true love i hope to find would be rephrasing.