That cyclops pogo man
that lives on Skye,
with all of his heart
he hates every pie.
A sad tale is his
full of pain and destruction
from a long time ago
we can see the cause for corruption.
When a young lad,
and Steve was his name,
a pie killed his parents
and this drove him insane.
After growing up in shadows
his mind grew sick
so what else would he do
but buy a pogo stick.
He lived in a cave
like a big ogre
and only emerging
to steal the odd toga.
The villagers got scared
over the loss of their garments
so they called on the wisdom
of the pie merchant Sire Kent's.
So Kent's baked his pies
to form up an army,
unsuspecting Steve only watched
while eating salami
'Fairly well seasoned'
he thought, unaware
of that obscenely large army
of pies, over there!
So they roared down the hillside
at terrifying speed
each and every one
wanting to make Steve bleed.
Desperately and hurriedly
he finished off his meat
and pogoed away leisurely
'cos pies don't have feet
Escaping dramatically
within an inch of his life
Steve was now homeless
he now faced great strife.
Where would he go
to rest his weary eye?
to find comfort and refuge?
well, obviously Skye.
So again off he set
with a bounce and a hop,
passing many a toga shop
although he did not stop.
He reached the end of the road
and looked around in despair
just a sun drenched hill
and a bright white hare.
It ran away at some speed
clutching a watch
saying something about a tea party
and pancakes that are scotch.
'wow!' exclaimed Steve
as he took no notice
he hopped away quickly
to say 'Hi' to Otis.
Otis was an estate agent,
he liked his jelly,
so Steve brought a house
which he found rather smelly
It smelled like bums
which wasn't too bad
for Steve was resilient,
he got it from his dad.
So here ends the tale
of Steve, and his adventure
but now he's is old
with senile dementure
Pogos sticks and togas
and pies and romance..
WHAT!??! oh wait!
I think the drugs are waring off now..
Author notes
well what can i say? but sorry at least i thought it was funny for a while... sorry bout the ending not that imaginative i know but some people (SIMON AND EAMON) are too impatient so there u go
P.S TA eamon for helping me out
Written March 2nd, 2004
A contest entry
- There are times to laugh and times to laugh louder! by GenderBender.
300 points, ended March 11, 2004, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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hmmm it must be that dastardly StrawberryFrost hooligan.
or maybe even that Shaggy fella...its all in the name. -
Hum hum
Definitely not me (whistles innocently). -
ok who suggested this poem as erotica???
-
My verdict? Why, it's Rick Moranis.
What a sad, sad tale of truly epic proportions. A whirlwind of emotions caught in a tumultious whirlpool of hope, dreams, despair and pies. How I love pies. And golden hills in chesire? Piffle and indeed poppycock. The only hills in Chesire that I spotted were of prettiest pink, pungentiest purple and bootyliciousiest beige. -
happy happy smiley smiley
lovley lovely poem, takes me back to my youth when I was a young lad out gallivanting in the golden hills of cheshire. -
hehe thank u loads...y should anyone be embarresed about having an immature and really silly humour? I'm not!
With kindest regards
Fart -
Excellent write, my sort of humour, I'm a bit embarressed to admit *smiles* absolutely loved it !!
Kat -
This is a funny, silly story, with good rhyming, and good old-fashioned craziness. A couple misspellings I noticed: "dementure" should be "dementia" and "waring" should be "wearing". IMHO, the last stanza can be dropped. Have a nice day!
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