Surely for dreaming--
streaming, lazy light of love.
Woke up to sweet buds
Author notes
give me five minutes and I'll give you a poem.
A contest entry
- Spring Haiku & Tanka by TheSpiralGenerator.
1000 points, ended April 2, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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I titled it so it would have one. I like using old past tense, but I suppose 'woke' is just as suitable.
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I do not know what it is, but I don't like your title. It may be preference, but I just do not like it. Your haiku, however, is an entirely different matter. Asides from the word 'waked', this is lovely.
In a helping manner, drop the d off of the word waked. Make it wake to sweet buds.
Then, come up with a much better title. I know you can do it. Your Haiku is brilliant, so that means you aree, too!
You could use one of these titles if you wish.
1. Dream Buds
2. Air of Sleep
3. Lazy Spring
or one of your own devising. Great job! Hope my review helped you out some! Thanks for sharing this with us!
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