I close my eyes and float like lead
Today is another hard day
Tall mountain exists in my head
It's a tough, tough climb to the sky
Why can you not climb in my stead?
I'm nowhere near the half way point
My energy almost all bled
No helping hand, words of comfort
Everyone else will be abed
Wanting to give in, surrender
Too much climbing and I'll be dead
My feet won't move, glued to the dream
This isn't quite how I had read
Losing grip on now, then and there
It's a dangerous road to tread
Still I fight to get to the top
Climbing a hill mortals do dread
Phantom floats beside me, mocking
His face says things best left unsaid
Skeletal corpses tell old tales
Somehow, my soul is still not fled
It's crawling more than climbing now
Demons, by my will, are well fed
They circle my dying body
Oddly they aren't black, they are red
Red with anger, red with mirth
Their smirking glares I need to shed
It's Metaphysical Mountain
Wanting to, with my mind, embed
Won't, can't, shan't let it in to me
Or else it will begin to spread
Oh won't a prince save me from it?
The one boy I'm destined to wed
It's a steep climb, Mountains so tall
Metaphysical Mountain bred
Author notes
The last line shouldn't make sense, don't worry if you don't get it.
Did you follow it?
Comments
-
Absolutely adored this; I'm glad I'm not the only one who didn't get the last line

Punctuation. Also, the double-spaced lines detracts from your awesomeness, just a little.
Keep it up, my dear!
Maria
-
Sweet
I love your writing. Fucking awesome, man.

-
-
Thank you!
-
-
Blown away completely.
I really adore the flow of this piece, your rhyme and rhythm are getting consistently better and I'm seeing huge improvements in that department.
You've put together some really nice lines and phrases in this and you managed to give me fabulous imagery which is definitely to your credit.
I like the rhythm coz I guess in my head, the way it's written makes it sound like this is being said in time to footsteps which I guess is quite ironic.
And the rhymes scheme is something different...it works really well for this poem but I think others may not have.
Keep it up Dean, you're really getting the hang of this whole poetry thing.




