‘you’re incapable of love’
i.
stone-hearted
I reminisce about those times
when you believed in me
before the clouds scattered,
and trees cried their leaves off
you used the word incapable
to describe your vulnerability
when looking into my constantly
bloodshot eyes.
ii.
I was never there to listen,
always in my own montage scene
where colors mixed
turning into a giant mosaic
that greatly resembled your beauty
iii.
I was sober when I saw
who you really were inside --
a destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes.
I never looked at color the same way again.
Author notes
prompt: resplendent
it made me think of colors and pretty stuff.. and i obviously had to make it depressing cause i can't write happy poetry lol.
hope it's alright.
In a list
- silver; • next in list
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- bronze; • next in list
- vignettes; • next in list
A contest entry
- Word Promptsss :] by youhadme-athello..
540 points, ended March 30, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I Live to Let You Shine by hey charlie.
600 points, ended April 29, 33 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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"and trees cried their leaves off"
You're a genious and you're a finalist too.
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Good. The flow is off, but the message is deep.
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"‘you’re incapable of love’" - I love how this piece starts. Draws you in quickly, knowing that it's going to be sad, but beautiful.
"before the clouds scattered,
and trees cried their leaves off" - Beautiful imagery.
"iii.
I was sober when I saw
who you really were inside --
a destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes.
I never looked at color the same way again." - Amazing ending.
This is beyond brilliant. This piece is sad and painful, but displayed so calmly and absent.
Beautiful write.
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"and trees cried their leaves off"
That's some brilliant imagery. I love the image of a tree being unhappy and therefor it sheds it's leaves, that's beautiful.
"a destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes.
I never looked at color the same way again"
'Amber sun eyes' What a beautiful line, that's really heartwarming and so vivid, easy to see, taste and smell the moment.
You've done an excellent job here!
Regards,
Sophie
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thank you
glad you liked it
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I've read this poem so many times since you posted it.
I love it, it reminds me of the story I have with that boy, especially;
"stone-hearted
I reminisce about those times
when you believed in me
before the clouds scattered,
and trees cried their leaves off"
This poem is so beautiful.
You wrote it so excellently.
I kinda wanna post all of it here, because I love every syllable of it.
*adds to list*
♥
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alsfkhalfhk
you make me happy
♥
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a destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes
this is beatiful
'you're incapable of love'
why are you so good at writing?
looove you <3 -
wow.
this really blew me away.
nice job interpreting the prompt :]
is interpreting the right word? i dont know, IT IS NOW! :]
great write.
thanks for entering!
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thanks for the comment and the trophy
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you're welcome!
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I love the starting line. Really paints a picture as too what will follow.
I was never there to listen,
always in my own montage scene
-gahh, just shroud everyone on this site with your brilliance why don't you?
I never looked at color the same way again.
-What a suprise, the ending is perfect.
Excuse me now whilst i burn all my insignificant words
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I think this is probably my favorite write of yours. Seriously, I love this to no extent.
"I was sober when I saw
who you really were inside --
a destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes."
That part is so freaking awesome, I can't even describe it.
You're amazing.
♣ Tegan
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thanks love <3
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this is amazing. I love:
'I destroyer of poppy fields,
and amber sun eyes.'
should 'I' be 'a' though?
really beautiful, best of luck.
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woopsies typo
thanks for catching that
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