I sat with you on that last silver night,
thinking that it was so cruel of God
to allow the only flaw in that crisp evening
to be the menacing glances
flowing like currents through the water
from your eyes to mine.
I thought I would surely die
from one more jolt of malice.
But through my time-tested armor
you rocked me at my core.
Your disgust was tangible
and it would be a year
before I sent that current back to you,
the one who owned it, the one who deserved it.
But oh, what damage was done
before I could accept your failings
as yours and not my own.
Comments
1 - 32 of 32
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Here's my inspirationally deep and meaningful comment full of long-winded babble:
Very nice. I like the ending =)
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Playing with Fire
I am so sorry that I did not take the time to let you know what was going on with me; I'll probably be off and on for a while, though not for such long stretches. "Oh, feel sorry for me" medical stuff. I was in a real bad car accident a while back and I'm having some complications, to say the least. The fact that you liked this poem, though, makes me smile. I will be checking up on your musings, too, my friend.
Blessed Be,
***Rae*** -
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Here's an idea, you save your energy for getting better and happy, and leave my 'musings' to entertain themselves =]
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Playing with Fire
OMG, you just gave me laugh I so needed today. Thank you so much. I'll be around to reciprocate, I promise.
Blessed Be,
***Rae***
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OUCH!!!
Wow this is stinging, but i say give it to them as good as you get it!
excellent imagery, felt i was baring witness to this scene in person, btw..what in god's name happened to you my friend?
i was certain i made u a fav. but somehow i never know when you are on, which means i thought you had left ap..
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Playing with Fire
Playing with Fire
I am so sorry that I did not take the time to let you know what was going on with me; I'll probably be off and on for a while, though not for such long stretches. "Oh, feel sorry for me" medical stuff. I was in a real bad car accident a while back and I'm having some complications, to say the least. The fact that you liked this poem, though, makes me smile. I will be checking up on your musings, too, my friend.
Blessed Be,
***Rae***
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Very engaging write here. i feel your emotions throughout this. i think is's good that you are releasing your feelings in your writes. it helps the readers identify with you even more. Keep up the great work.
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Thank you very much. Sorry for the late reply, I was a bit under the weather. Yes, I tend to use my poetry as catharsis more than prose & I'm glad so many people appreciate it. I will take understanding over talent any day!!
Blessed Be,
Rae
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This is an exellent piece of poetry full of deep passion and regret.
You write this poem so well, and the personal touch is heart felt.
thanks for sharing, be blessed in all you do.
tony
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You do have a Poet's Soul, indeed! Thank you for always understanding my poems to the depths that you do; that is a rare thing indeed! I have few friends here on AP (that I am lucky to have) who, for some reason, like what I write! You are one of them and I am glad!
Thank you so much,
Rae
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Wow, powerful stuff!!!
Compelling narrative that gripped me from the off, drew me in & took me on a dark journey that comes full circle...
Awesome, keep up the good work...
Well done!!!
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Thanks again! Yeah, Karma's a bitch. The three-fold rule doesn't seem to cause me much harm when I'm sending it straight back to the one who hurt me in the first place. I shouldn't brag, but after his abuse I'm going to. By the time I sent it back and drove home, he (had the nerve) to call me crying to say he'd lost his job, was probably going to lose his house, his (mortgage helper) was moving out, his mother had stopped talking to him over the way he treated me and his girlfriend was cheating on him. Cry me a river. When you get what you put out, it suck doesn't it??
***Rae*** -
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Wow, you type fast...
Yeah, what goes around, comes around, just a shame about the waiting time... Instant Karma would be much more gratifying sometimes... Lol!
Love your work... You Rock
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Oh, I didn't see the "you rock" thing. I do? Cool! Thanks. I guess I type fast because of all the office work before the car accidnet. Dum b*itch. Oh, here I go again. Karma, Rachel, Karma. Be nice and be patient, lol!
Blessed Be,
***Rae*** -
Oh man, instant Karma, I think, would change the world, lol!
Rae -
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Yeah, would love to see that...
Karma strikes...
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Wouldn't thabe lovely?! Watching mean people get zapped in the ass everyday?
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Oh to be in that world...
Lol!
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Very well done and how I really understand the lines -
But oh, what damage was done
before I could accept your falings
as yours and not my own.
Sheila
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I'm going to have to check out your poetry! Thanks again for the lovely comments. But oh, what damage was done
before I could accept your falings
as yours and not my own
Yes, when you have an emotional/mental abuser, the bruises don't show but they take a damn long time to heal. I founf a real man - not a boy- and he has made up in a thousand ways for what this loser put me through.
Blessed be,
***Rae***
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Ah..you have retold the depth and the truth of the life through the words of a wonderful poetry..well done..and thanks for sharing...
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You are to kind to me for taking so much time to read so many of my poems! And your comments are very wise, either you are a very strong man or you have learned how to be strong. I am getting there. I am getting stronger every day.
Blessings,
***Rae***
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well written i love dark poems....
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Thank you very much; I like dark poetry, too. Obviously!
***Rae***
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The only kind of offensive magic that is allowable. Sending back the malignancy that has been heaped upon you to those who deserve it.
One of the biggest steps we can make in progressing to a higher state of being is to accept who we are and not accept that which others would have us believe.
excellent write,
Peace
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I agree; it was his Karmic baggage, not mine. I would never bless a house or crystal or perform a love spell without anyone's permission just as I would never conscienously send negative energy toward somone who mailigned me, uunless it was harmful to me or my family. You're spot on!
Rachel
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It is so good for me Little Miracle ...
to see you write out all that pain.
And you do it so well. The key to healing is apparent in the exit lines ...
before I could accept your failings
as yours and not my own.
!
Love
Myra
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Yes, my poems tend to be a little dark lately but it is because I am finally getting it all out. I pretended to be fine for so long, but I need to tell him (and the girl who hit me) that they were WRONG. I did nothing. It's been therapeutic and wonderful at the same time.
Love you,
Rae
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I sense a bit of bitterness in this.
Extremely well written as always though. I find your subject matter fascinating but never so obvious that you don't actually have to think about what you are reading. Ten out of ten!
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Oh yeah, there's bitterness. When someone turns you into Barbie so they can have you on their arm for five years - all the while telling you how much they love you - then you have an accident and they bolt? The same week? Oh, how I do love Karma, cause it did come back to him last year. This guy took from a rural kid to a city woman then to a broken one. But I've learned my lesson well: don't go for suave! Nice, intelligent, watches cartoons sometimes, listens to blues, laughs, tickles maybe even a bit dorky. I just figured that out two years ago after he bolted. And it was the best thing that could have happened to me!
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Karma can be a very powerful thing. I have gypsy blood in me (a little bit anyway) and anyone who does anything malicious to me or my loved ones really gets it in the arse almost instantly. But I know to my peril that it works both ways 'cos I've had a pretty rough time of it through certain periods of my life. But I think that the best thing to do is to accept full responsibility for your life choices. I hope you understand what I mean and don't just think I'm rambleing for the sake of it. I hope everything is ok for you now and wish you nothing but pure happiness for the future. Respect, Jimmy.
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Oh, no I know completely what you mean. As a Wiccan, I have to watch my temper because I can send out energy without even meaning to and then it comes right on back to me. I know that the choices that I've made in my life (except for the car accident) I probably knew fully what I was getting into and went right on ahead anyway. That's my fault and no one else's. Maybe I was a little young and a little jaded and a lot taken advantage of, but if I had heeded advice, things would not have escalated they way the did - in many situations. So I understand- very well!
Rae
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