Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

White and So Fragmented

And as broken as they are,
they are still
solid
(but not strong)
Solid and full of heat and brilliance,
and as they erupt within the sky,
white and so fragmented,
these stones become something much greater than themselves.
Its blaze
betrays its                c o m p o s i t i o n.
(Let go)

Let fresh wounds heal as these kisses shatter across your sky.
F  I  G  H  T  .
You cannot hold onto these pebbles any more,
and in this empty space filled only with fog,
we can find
such  b e a u t i f u l  monotone
(Grey)

This damper on the world keeps you as brilliant as ever.
Sooth your wounds once more
and let you
implode.

I'll fix you.


A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • LeilaJayne
    November 15

    Edit | Reply
    The combination of font and background makes it a little hard to read clearly, which takes away from the piece, maybe consider changing one? That aside, this was very good, i love the design of it
    Thanks so much for entering and best of luck in the contest x


  • Zeprina-Jaz
    March 28

    Edit | Reply
    I love how you played around with form here, and the take on the prompt was flawless. The background, however, makes it a little hard to read. That's the only criticism, though!