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Endless River

Ever moving path
Eternity flows swiftly
River with no end

A contest entry

Tell me what you think of when you read it.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

  • Tybar
    April 8
    Edit | Reply
    Most of the time I have not seen Haiku with punctuation (though I haven't done huge amounts of extensive research. The connection I was driving for was the flowing from paths to eternity to rivers. Thank you both for your comments!

  • Lilac Moon silver member
    April 6
    Edit | Reply
    This is a case (for me, anyway) where puncuation would make the difference. (And after already entering, I should probably do some more research on Haiku and punctuation. Sorry!)

    Anyway, with punctuation, it would read:

    Ever moving path,
    eternity moves swiftly;
    river with no end.

    This makes sense to me.

    Lilac Moon


  • Samplette gold member
    March 28

    Edit | Reply
    I read this over and over again...it reads more like three separate statements. It has nothing to connect them together. Still, I like the concept. Thank you for entering the contest.
    Sam