Every time you took a breath
my heart stopped,
I never knew
which one would be your last.
I just sat there
praying for you to wake up,
but knowing you should let go.
They told us you could hear us.
I talked to you that whole day,
tried to pretend like it wasnt the end,
but we all knew.
I sensed when it was getting closer,
felt my insides slipping away,
and on that fatal second
I felt my soul fly with you.
When the doctors came
to confirm the news,
they said your heart-rate was increasing.
I knew you would never stop fighting,
so I begged you with every ounce of strength I had...
....just let go...
and as though you listened,
the beating ended.
And I just held you,
as your paper-thin body got colder by the second,
Its been nearly four months,
still,
I cry myself to sleep every night,
and this flat
is not home anymore.
It screams of emptiness and cold.
You always prepared me for life,
but not this,
we never talked about you leaving.
I guess I took for granted that you wouldn't.
But now you're gone,
and every breath i take
hurts just that little bit more.
I miss you Nan.
Author notes
This is in no way a work of art, not even slightly, but its not meant to be. My nan died just under 4 months ago, I had lived with her my whole entire life, its taken until today to write. I just did this, its nothing great, its just my feelings...i cried the whole entire time.
RIP Nan 28/09/23 - 29/11/08 <3
She got diagnosed with cancer in August, and in November...she was gone.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I was browsing and I found this. It made me so emotional. I lost my Nan to cancer when I was 17. I wasn't with her when she died as I chose not to be. I still feel guilty for not saying goodbye but I was scared if I saw her dying that would be the image of her I remembered forever.
Not sure how I would describe this....it's a beautiful piece of writing about an awful subject xxx -
Very sad and very emotional... a great write straight from your heart xxx
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I only just realised this is you!! Hello (: lol x
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I'm so sorry about your gram. I know how you feel. My gram just died a week ago. It hurt to watch her like she was, holding on when all they want is to let go.
A great poem from the heart. 
~Kystal Angel
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awww huni you nearly made me cry.
You sound so critical of yourself in the author notes....my Nan died 2years ago this summer and it's only in the past month that I've actually been able to put to words some of the actual facts of the 10days she was ill.
This is amazing...it may not be the bestest thing you have ever written but it came from the heart and that is what matters.
You are so brave.
XXXXX
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Aw sis... this is so sad I'm so glad though that you could finally write about it. It is actually beautifully written, as it expresses true emotion. I felt this to my core and tears came to my eyes. I know your loss...
Lots of
xx
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this is really deep and emotional..i wish you the best to come it will get better.....
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i know this isnt for art. and i can feel your pain within each word. i am so sorry for your lost. but you have expressed your self wonderfully. i know your nan is looking down on you. making sure your never alone
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