It's okay
I'm just here at your convenience
Your personal dial-a-friend service,
Not that you would dial first.
I exist to hear your woes and wins
I run completely on clockwork
No need to wind me up.
I can sit in silence
Or give you a pat on the back.
If I state my own opinion, consult the manual
It must be a malfunction.
As an added bonus I am completely disposable
For disposal instructions see below:
1. Stop answering calls
2. If you accidentally answer, make plans you don't intend to keep
No previous notice necessary!
Author notes
Dear everyone:
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Spot on!
Love it!
I know what you mean, I have "friends" that use me like this as well :/
Very well worded, and sharp. (y)
Nice one
I dig the lines
"If I state my own opinion, consult the manual
It must be a malfunction." it's very good metaphor and belittles who you are talking about perfectly!
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Thank you very much.
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