Beneath the quickly melting snow,
The promise of the springtime lies.
And unborn flowers yearn to grow,
The ugliness of earth disguise.
The threads of green begin to weave
A robe for all the world to wear.
Warm winds rush through and bid cold leave,
Wild rabbits preen, and dance, and pair.
A leafy roof spreads overhead,
The grass grows thick beneath my feet.
I put away my skis and sled,
And lift my face toward summer's heat.
She slips in quickly, breezes sweet and mild,
Fresh, warm and cuddly, creations favorite child.
Author notes
This is part of 4 poems, one for each of the seasons. All comments welcome
Written February 29th, 2004
In a list
A contest entry
- Spring Fever 2 by Heavenly Angel.
300 points, ended March 21, 2006, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Hmm...funnily I felt that a line or two here was a bit forced and this won a gold and the better ones nothing
Another gr8 poem, but I wd definitely prefer the others.This line doesn't seem right:
Warm winds rush through and bid cold leave,
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Paul, this is wonderful! You took basically every element of Spring there is and wrote it beautifully within every line of this piece! Thank you very much for sharing this! I loved it! Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful!!!
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I liked it!
I like it! A very admirable effort in a difficult form. -
Lovely one
Again, delightful. The last two lines didn't match the others in iambic tetrameter. The second last spread to a pentameter and the last was even longer.
If you wanted to match the rhythm, you could cut the third last line to read 'And lift my face to summer's heat.'
and your last two lines could be cut to read:
'She slips in breezy, sweet and mild,
Creation's fresh and favorite child.'
But then again, it is pretty good as it stands. -
I enjoyed this piece, the first few lines were my favorite:
'Beneath the quickly melting snow,
The promise of the springtime lies.
And unborn flowers yearn to grow,
The ugliness of earth disguise.'
That was beautiful, the rest of the poem seemed to throw in random things and I disliked that, maybe I just have a short attention span.
Keep up the writes
.Amanda.
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Excellent!
There's nothing like the freshness of springtime (except, perhaps, this refreshing sonnet).
Maureen
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i see that you are extremely talented! i love sonnets. i am just now learning this form but have always loved reading them. you are especially good at writing them. such beautiful images! it is a delight to read your work
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sweet
It's nice to read a sonnet because they flow so well I love your flowery background, sir.
~S -
that's really a very nice one...lovely imagery and everything else too hehe..excellent
Lea -
And in the spring, the blooms on my magnolia tree are fuzzy on the outside. Glad you liked it - it was fun to write.
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And unborn flowers yearn to grow,
The ugliness of earth disguise.
I just love those lines...I don't know why, I just do. Such a warm sounding poem, and I love the imagery too. The sights of rabbits preening and pairing off, the lush grass and how it feels under foot...ah yes...I so love spring! HUGS! Dari x -
I loved this! It gives me a really...warm and fuzzy inside! It's so pretty. I love Spring so much. Thanks for sharing! Thanks for entering my contest and good luck!
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Nice job...again a couple of excess words but you know...I'm picky. Love the way you described the beginning to spring. Great job with the imagery.
M
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