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charlie's conversations: somewhere south of that big desert in africa

so what you're telling me is that we are out here to kill the killers for sport...

pretty much. it gets fun when you see the terror in their eyes.

it seems far less exciting than getting to run away from them.

how's that?

anybody can put a bullet through a monster's teeth, take the breath from the poor bastard. few live to tell about feeling that breath on the back of their leg, pissing themselves at the thought of those teeth stopping them in their tracks.

you're going to chase a fucking lion today, aren't you?

want me to kiss her for you?



Author notes

it is by a very technical definition very much 10 lines max

A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • swim.x
    October 17

    Edit | Reply
    this is ridiculously good.
    bookmarked.
    wow. i'm reading the rest of these conversations now.
    i'm beginning to love charlie, whoever he may be


  • PorcelainHope
    September 28
    Edit | Reply
    "want me to kiss her for you?"
    Brilliant - that's all I have to say.


  • seraphim shock
    April 8
    Edit | Reply
    this is going on my list of the-best-things-i've-ever-read-on-AP


  • autarky
    March 22
    Edit | Reply
    i'm in love with charlie


  • sharptooth
    March 22
    Edit | Reply
    you can definitely pull off profanity in poems. some people can't, but it adds a realistic touch, cos people do talk like that. it was conversational and the italics added a nice touch.

    the last line baffles me a bit... her, as in the lion?

    thanks for entering

    • divebar
      March 22
      Edit | Reply
      the her is intentionally ambiguous. i like cutting out the action and just leaving the words.

      but if youre really interested, you might get a little out of this
      http://www.geocities.com/cyber_explorer99/hemingwaymacomber.html


      • sharptooth
        March 22

        Edit | Reply
        yeah, i don't mind the end line it just intrigued me

        thanks for the link


        • divebar
          March 22
          Edit | Reply
          i plug hemingway short stories wherever i can. god knows he botched almost all his novels. hahaha


          • parachute fog
            March 25
            Edit | Reply
            i completely agree with that, his shorts were masterful

            the whole ice berg principle approach with the simple presentations

          • sharptooth
            March 22
            Edit | Reply
            that's perfectly alright. i haven't read anything by him before, & i like being introduced to new stuff. i'm such a slacker, haven't read anything in so long.


  • woodyperth
    March 22
    Edit | Reply

    oh yes

    Damn thats good...

    Mwaah (K)

1 - 12 of 12