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Tanka T1

Nature’s works  enwombed

gravities' umbilical;

Hold me mother earth

universe sings cradlesong,

solar winds whisper… hurry

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    November 20
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    Powerful Imagery!!

    Reminds me of a line by William Wordworth: "Nature never did betray the heart that loved her." Pen on, Poet!!
    Peace,
    Cyn


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    April 6

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    thank you for sharing with me today and i wish you luck in this contest you have entered. viyanna rosemarie


  • BonnieQ silver member
    March 29
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    Gentle Imagery

    As you know, Michael, I do not know much about poetic forms; but, I can say this is full of imagery, gentle imagery. Sort of reminds me of a mother rocking her babe and signing a lullaby. Ahhh, yes, as mother earth cradles the life upon her. Well done!

    Luv in Christ, BonnieQ


  • yukitosumi
    March 23
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    reading this reminds me that I have to go to contemporary astronomy soon. Hmm.
    ANYWAY! I see that you wrote that this is your first tanka. I hope you decide to write some more!
    Defininitely the first tanka that I've ever read that used any of the following words: enwombed, umbilical, solar winds. Awesome.
    Very creative write.
    Best,
    Y and S

    • Michael P gold member
      March 23
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      thank you yes, I enjoyed the challange of Tanka it was actually (and surprisingly) relaxing...peace


  • individuality gold member
    March 22

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    i like the science fiction/fact theme here, where the universe is the mother as opposed to mother nature earth. the ending too i like which says to me come and join the society of stars, grow up and smile. a good poem.


  • ten thousand cicadas gold member
    March 20

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    Nice how this far-reaching imagery flows throughout, taking the universal and making it quite personal. I know very little about Tankas but so far as the thoughts and images go, this is well done!


  • SimplyNoodle
    March 20

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    Well written wonderfuly flow. Promise me youll nver stop writting, Good poets like you are great for the world today. Keep writing!
    ~ Chelsey

1 - 11 of 11