Well, I’m savin' my money,
'Cause things are real tight,
And it’s gettin' kinda' hard to sleep at night.
I got laid off last month,
After 20 odd years,
But it ain't no use sheddin' my tears.
The people I worked for,
Shuttered the mill,
They coulda' sold it, and we’d be workin' there still.
Though it seemed to make sense,
And their praises we’d sing,
Seems corporate greed is a curious thing.
I got an education,
And experience too,
But these days, it seems, like that just won’t do.
And so I'm poundin' the pavement,
Lookin' for work,
But in the shadows, poverty lurks.
New jobs are comin',
Is what they all say,
And things will all get better one day.
I hope they come soon,
'Cause lately it seems,
I'm sayin' farewell to all of my dreams.
Got a house I can't sell,
'Cause the market went south,
I really don’t know just what that’s about.
I put all my savings,
In a retirement plan,
But I lost most of it to some kinda' scam.
If I hear of work,
Ya' know I’ll give you a call,
But things aren’t lookin' too good at all.
Times will get better,
Is what I’ve been told,
But in the meantime, the wind sure blows cold.
If things turn around,
And we’re back in the pink,
We’ll meet up again and our glasses we’ll clink.
So take heart my brother,
Ya' know we gotta’ be strong,
At least 'till better times come along.
A contest entry
- Prewrite Contest III by T.o.r.t.u.r.e..
700 points, ended May 18, 126 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - To Be Put On My Favorites List by Ted E Bare.
400 points, ended October 15, 249 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - country lyrics group and others by poets whisper.
900 points, ended July 20, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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To me this is perfect because I can relate too it so much. Thank you so much for the entry in my contest and good luck!
~~Tay. -
"So take heart my brother,
Ya' know we gotta’ be strong,
At least 'till better times come along." this would make a great chorus ... inserted here and there and then at the end. I like the story that the lyrics tell. So true to life. nice job †hank you for entering. -
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Thank you so much for the win!
and your kind insight, I'm going to your page now!
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The trial of self through adversity
It may not look like it, but I have been where you were with no money, no job, and no prospects. It took me 6 months to find a job that wasn't temporary. I liked the way that you ended on a positive note. It is when you are in the worst of times that you discover who you really are, and if you find something to like about that person, you can hold hope for better times. What would be truly tragic is to find out that you don't like who you really are. I can't imagine the ending to a poem about that. So I am most grateful that you found something to like about yourself when all else was gone, and gave us this hope for "hard times".
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this is really a good write. thank you for entering and good luck in the contest
"The people I worked for,
Shuttered the mill,
They coulda' sold it, and we’d be workin' there still.
Though it seemed to make sense,
And their praises we’d sing,
Seems corporate greed is a curious thing.
I got an education,
And experience too,
But these days, it seems, like that just won’t do."
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the best thing i have read all day
I have been reading AP all day, alot of good poems, alot of crappy poems, but this one is a very good one. This is very relevant and America feels your pain. You had a very strong voice throughout this and i enjoyed this very much. Thank you for the badass read.
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Bravo!
Dear TAP,
The comments people are making about your poem say it all... you hit a note that needs expression here at AP and all around the USA...
I went through it all in 2000 and all I can say is
out of the ashes will come something wonderful!
Think of it as an evolution.
This was a wonderful poem!
The honesty shines with each word.
Bravo!
Jane
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Thanks so much
for your kind words...the strange thing is,I wrote that poem in about 1 hour, and I never thought it would get noticed, I was just kind of blowing off steam.
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I think that this is one that way too many people can unfortunately relate to, but the closing words offer an important reminder that better days are ahead.
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You are speaking to alot in dire straits out there as yourself that will be assured as you close your write that we are to take heart. I am in Canada and hear of the layoffs, and closures, and some have happened here.
I like your ryhme scheme and flow...and I like your write..Do keep penning poet!
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Well for your first one, this is awesome. Since I got out of the military, works has been a pain in the ass to find. Thought about going back in. I hope it gets better for ya!
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definitely reads like lyrics. I love this...and so true the words.
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WOW where is the music, this would make a good song.
What a fine write on our present times. Seems many people are going through this same scenario.
You have done a wonderful job here poet.I wish you the best, hope all goes well for you.
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Times are so hard right now. I am so sorry you hear about your unfortunate events. For a beginner at poetry this is a magnificent piece. I felt the emotions run through each word. The sadness, but hopefullness. Well penned.
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Thanks for your kind words...
they really mean a lot someone just starting out. -
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Anytime, I look forward to reading your others.
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i hope you really didn't get laid off. my dad's company did the same thing several years back and about caused a riot as there were so many of them without work. thank you for sharing this with me today and i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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This is so incredible and timely. You speak for so many people in this same situation, not just in USA but UK and Australia too.
You have hit the nail right on the head, so to speak, with the usual oft repeated responses to men looking for work, I can only imagine this is what happened during the depression of the 20’s too.
Loss of Dreams: it is a hard pill to swallow along with the possibility of losing one’s home. Another comment states this could be lyrics, I have to agree. I can hear it all with Johnny Cash’s voice – I don’t wish to appear flippant but it’s very good and the fact that it’s a true story makes it more than real, it’s the here and now.
Bloody Brilliant! - Von
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VERY well done. Reads like lyrics to [dare I say it?] a country song. [yes, I said it! but honestly, cause I was a Country Radio DJ for 6 years]
Seriously, the flow from stanza to stanza is very easy on the eye, and the raw emotion comes through even when the rhymes seem "cute".
My wife was "let go" in Feb. '08... which we were upset about at the time, but have come to realize it was actually the best time of 2008 to be without a job, as there were still jobs to be found without locating to another state. I live in a city that just has its' GM plant shut down last December... after 80 some odd years.
So, best of luck to you, from one of the 85%.
Write On!
jIM
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Thank you so much for your review.
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Thanks for your review and
your kind words, best of luck to you guys!
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And when better times come, lets make it the night of our lives!!! Good job man, and keep up the good work!!
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