"On the right foot
-this relationship is good."
On the rightest of feet,
we walk tall and strong.
Passersby look at us
and almost audibly long
to feel as we do
and to glow as we must.
They ache for the bond
that is the force of us.
We are geniuses at love
on the most right foot,
speaking sonnets 'cross rooms
with no more than a look.
We are worlds and galaxies,
the very essence of life.
On the right foot of love
we are man and wife.
© amber langham
Author notes
**this topic hits close to home...as i am one of those people whose relationship is shakey, but the core of it is out of this world. so, on the right foot, we have what is immeasurable. on the wrong foot though...watch out! great topic!
A contest entry
- This relationship is good.~ by SandraMVeinot.
400 points, ended April 1, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
-
I loved this piece...stunning in its deep quality of sure-footedness (especially, the "right foot"). Such good rhyming too. What a marvelous delight to click on my first read by you and to be so pleasantly surprised and entertained. Congrats too on the "core" part of your relationship that you mention in your ANs; how valuable is that? Excellent really.
AsIThink...
-
Standing ovation
Bravo, anyone who finds such bliss a this deserves my applause.....chael The secrets screamed out in quiet glances
-
"We are worlds and galaxies,
the very essence of life.
On the right foot of love
we are man and wife."
-Nice wrap-up. First two lines are very powerful in their meaning.-
"We are geniuses at love
on the most right foot,
speaking sonnets 'cross rooms
with no more than a look."
-Very nicely put.-
-
I love this poem. My wife and I went through a hellish first 4 years of our relationship/marriage, and this is where we're at. If you have that core, don't let it go, it's so hard to find.
-
Very Good
Well written - I like it - you probably have a lot of us in that relationship - we have been married 50 years - lots of right foot days and plenty of left foot days - lol - Your sutle rhyme and flow great - keep on keeping on - Bless God - Joe --------------hugs
-
Very good!
-
The deeper the love, I've found, the more complex the problems.
-
I read a few of your pieces in response to your comment. This one reads the best by far. Very clean and a fantastic subject too. Well done.
-
Thank you for letting me also read the poem here today.
-
Perfecto
this is a beautiful piece of artistry that should be hung in a museum. I love the profoundness of the piece and how it simply flow off the toungue like a kiss caught in a breeze.
-Keep the ink flowing!
-Ninth Poet
-
Tender rhyme within this piece give it the glow needed for the charm of love. Truly an enjoyable and very human verse.
"Passersby look at us
and almost audibly long
to feel as we do
and to glow as we must."
I loved this statement right here because it truly says it all. It simply made me smile. Nice work.
~Pamela
-
it's all good when it is on the right foot, smiles and dancing, love and laughter, hearts that whisper secrets to each other - the left foot though is a different matter lol that's where love twists us into crazy shapes. a good poem.
-
I like this a lot. I like the easy rhyming, and the imagery that is created by viewing a relationship as having different "feet." I think it offers some insight into the complicated reality that is any relationship. Nice write and best of luck in the contest with this piece.
-
We are geniuses at love.....
I dont know why...i really dont...
but this poem brought to mind an annie lennox song....
no more i love yous....
i think because there is a poem in your heart about the left foot.....
I may be wrong.......
but this is beautiful lass...
we walk tall and strong.......
promenade lass...
give em something to talk about.
Fine work here!
Bless you lass
Lowell
-
-
THANK YOU MY IRISH FRIEND
and you are quite right....it would be more natural to me to write about that lazy, limp left foot. i'm sure i would not be at a loss for words. as i'm growing accustom to, your comment brought a great big smile.
-
-
This is quite lovely, I used to be in this sort of relationship. It eventually withered and fell. Wonderful write, brings to mind seeing the elderly couples walking hand and hand in the park.
nice
peace
-
Well said. I get the feeling that the two are glowing with love.
Adding your comment:
1 - 17 of 17
