Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

12

rattling machine guns becoming lullabies
Sucessful fear  silencing wailing cries
cardboard houses decorated in bullet holes
Over dilapidated paths army jeeps roll

thin frames squeezing to fit beneath wire frames
killers- soldiers will never know their names
sisters cling to baby brothers, gripping wire mesh
richocheting balls of fire- piercing dusty flesh

born into hushed whispers under plastic roofs,
and barely concealed bravado about a war
they expected to win.

One year old chubby feet teeter in front
of doorsteps, too young to be afraid of camoflauge
trucks creating ruts in the dusty path.

Two years old- hanging on Mama's neck,
kissing her cheeks, unable to even process
why they were wet.


Three years old chasing curly haired brothers
while Mama huddles with twenty year old faces
adorned in worry lines and wrinkles- hints of
hopeful dangerous smiles.

Four year old eyes waiting for the dust devils
conjured by returning home students,
running into the patchwork skirts of his sister,
confused as to where his brother went.

Five year old fingers grip a twig, drawing in the dirt
pictures of smiling mothers, tackling his brother
a year before when he turned 12- waiting to go to school.

Six year old ears shiver as the rattle of gunshots
ring out in a crowded hallway as lists are read
and three syllable names runaway on stick feet.


Seven year old red rimmed eyes blink away
tiny tears, trying to be strong for his older sister
as deadly fireworks break open the night.

Eight years old- head down reading black letters
till eyes swim with dust and anger- sharp point of a gun
sticks into the classroom- as a soldier stares them all down.

Nine years old nails broken and crusted from retrieving
marbles rolled over Government army replicas-and
clenching them in dusty cloth-hiding

Ten year old feet leap from doorway to doorway
chasing his sister trying to get to the bed of her fallen
friend whose cry illuminated the night
eyes closed shut, shallow breathing.
 
Eleven year old waiting soul- crossing fingers
that each day he'd stagger up the hill
and fall exhausted onto cotton blankets-untaken.


Almost twelve- shaking his head and covering his ears
at his mother's sobered crying- missing him already
on nights gunshots didn't boom boom boom in the night.

  Eleven and a half- counted the months since last almost
spring- racing to the doorway to bolt driftwood doors
and press deadened mattresses against peek hole windows

Twelve years old- crying, waiting to be taken- risking everything
uncaring whether his body becomes one of the Guerilla dead
or a decoy for the government daring his people to kill their own.


Twelve years old- El Salvador- lived his life in the war- even
a newborn when it began- he wasn't young enough to escape.

12 brutal years- story of his life.

Author notes

This is a fairly true story- the voice of one of the many shattered innocents of the Civil war in El Salvador starting in 1980. If you have a chance watch the movie ' Voces Innocentes' (innocent voices) with english subtitles its really disturbing and upsetting. But really good. We watched some of it in Spanish today while sopomores took their exit exams (mixed level classes hence there being no point of having five kids in Spanish class) . I watched it and I'm not excited to finish it tomorrow because its so heartbreaking- I wanted to cry its painfully good and sad. But something worth seeing

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • Draig aine gold member
    April 2

    Edit | Reply

    CONGRADULATIONS ON THE silver

    I have watched the piece you mention, and this is an excellent voice on war and its most tragic victims


  • the-gifted
    April 1

    Edit | Reply
    thank you for writing this. it is a reminder of what some had to go through to get us here today. it shows that we all have better lives then the ones in the past and we should be thankful. again thanks for sharing and entering it in my contest. good luck and thanks again.


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    March 26

    Edit | Reply
    So very sad this is
    War is a terrible thing and the innocents that have to witness it and endure it...well, it just should never be...
    Thank you for sharing this
    All the best to you, poet


  • purplemoon
    March 24

    Edit | Reply

    Heartbreaker!!

    This poem almost made me cry. It is very lovely and sadly heartbreaking. I'm truley just starting to grasp the poverty and war that raveges the world as we know it. (Hey I'm only 13). This poem is a very touching poem. It has a personality all it's own yet it is a part of some network of things pretaing to this subject. I've never read a story within a poem like this, Bravo and Well done.

    Thanks For Your entry.
    Kathryn


  • Bean Sidhe silver member
    March 18

    Edit | Reply
    This read very much like a poignant story. It's easy to think that life is so hard (especially now, for me personally - newly divorced, laid off from a job I'd had for many years, facing bankruptcy, foreclosure or worse) but in reality, I'm not starving. I'm not facing death at every sunrise. This poem brought that into painful view.

    I appreciate the format and the obvious care you took with this piece, including the addition of the Author's Note. It shows that this plight really does touch you deeply.

    If I had anything negative to say about it at all, it would be the inconsistency of the rhyme. It was pretty prevalent in the first two stanzas but then sort of petered out. But my preference is always for freewrite so even that doesn't seem like a fair complaint.

    In any case, thank you for your entry and good luck in the contest!

    -Beàn Sidħe

  • RechercheCadaver
    March 18

    Edit | Reply
    This is really heart breaking, even more so because of the vividness and the realistic view you have given me into a life so differently lived than my own. I admire the simple and direct language you have used; it is a gate like no other to a child's world. Also, thank you for the short explanation in your author's notes. I feel that this poem applies to situations in many parts of the world (sadly). Technically, your use of punctuation created an easy to follow rhythm, and I love how time appears to slow down by the end of the poem.

1 - 6 of 6