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you'll live on

  As soon as I came into yours and mums room
With the pill boxes in my hands
Ready to do away with my life
You were prepared to listen
You were the only guy that I ever accepted
You touched my life in more ways that you’ll ever know
When I was at my most desperate time
You automatically got me up
Made me show you where it happened
Which guest house on that road
As I pointed it out
The fear over run my body
My hands and legs shaking
We drove straight back home
Dad you were so understanding
Soon after you and mum found out
About the eating disorders and the self harm
Your eyes shown me you didn’t understand
But you were still there when needed to hold my hand
You will never be forgotten
Even though you did a lot of harm
You will always be remembered
I still feel you here when I have my cigarette
God I would love to give it up
But then I wouldn’t feel you here
I remember when we would sit on the porch
In the early morning hours
I would share my issues
And you would pay attention
We would smoke our cigarettes together
Even when we found out about your
Gambling and drug addictions
Who was I to tell you off
When I was just as appalling
Tonight I go out for our two cigarettes
One for me to take away my stress
And one for you to remember you with
I always seem to smell you in the smoke
Just for that second
I hold that second so close
You are still here
I wish you had never gone
I really wish that you had carried on
It’s all a hard battle
And I see mum struggle
She puts up this mask to world
But deep down I can see it
She can hide
You gave me so much confidence
And lifted me up which made me strong
I went to the therapy
I wish you wasn’t gone
I still see you 
I don’t think this Christmas will be easy
Medication has changed
I’m feeling your loss now
Dad you will always be a part of me
You touched my life
You’ll live on
 

Author notes

Natasha Bedingfield- still here

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • FallenFromGrace1102
    September 3

    Edit | Reply
    Keep up the beautiful work, i wish you the best of luck in my contest and thank you for entering this piece.

    spread the awerness

    *~*bee*~*


  • xXMe17xX
    July 5

    Edit | Reply
    its sad in a different way and i like that. very sad yes..im sorri x


  • Heva Feva
    June 6
    Edit | Reply
    Great job. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva


  • TwilightAngel026
    April 27
    Edit | Reply
    An emotional one for sure. Thanks for sharing it in the contest.


  • moaner
    April 26

    Edit | Reply
    ok i know ive said i was near to crying on some poems, but this actualy made me cry. i dont think ive ever had anyone i could do this with. for the first time in my life, i really wish i had a dad, but in the end, i probably never would have spoke to him either just like my mum. why was i such a silent person? anyway, i love this. like i really love this. still crying you cow ha. if you could manage it at some point, you got a lots a grammer to catch up on in this one x


    • DEAL xx WITH xx IT gold member
      April 26
      Edit | Reply
      cool I will work on that grammer later on hehe ....sorry I made you cry... I kind of had a feeling that this one would lol xxx


  • Patpowers silver member
    April 26
    Edit | Reply
    Well done my friend...well expressed. Thanks again for writing.


  • Walking Oxymoron
    April 14

    Edit | Reply
    Wow... that was sad.

    I dunno that song. You didn't give me a link.

    But that was a sad write, and truthful... and I'm seeing the fag thing now too.


  • MichaelSavage gold member
    March 20
    Edit | Reply
    Very good way of expressing yourself. Good poem. Good luck.

1 - 9 of 9