hamilton never did find a girl
21 guns, that's what he got
i accidentally saluted
as they folded the flag
and presented his parents-
and all their convalescence-
with the hollow novelties
of a fallen hero
though t.p.
and potato cannons
were the only weapons
he fired,
and youthful lexicon
and out of context phrases
were the terms
of his arsenal
when the bullets flew
from between the hairs
of his polished teeth
those were the good times,
milk jugs full of beer,
pints of Philadelphia
and needles for strength
under the hot blowing fan
of falling metal plates
then he went for a marine,
white belted and blue chested,
when he came home.
his style was as tight
as his belly
wherein the devils slept
and the ghost of a needle
haunted his liver
when i heard of his dying,
i knew why.
the problem with a young soldier
is that his heart is strong
this complicates the dying
by months.
his final wish was to be with a girl.
he lingered as though he was waiting
for a pretty, brown haired girl
to meet him in
some far away lobby
for a movie and dinner,
of course, she never came.
he died on all souls day
within a huddle
of family and friends
who called his final play.
hamilton never did find a girl
Author notes
cancer in the service. by kevin o'connor/ui'connabhair
A contest entry
- A Tribute To Heather. by SimplyNoodle.
4100 points, ended August 3, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Depressing by stargardt13.
400 points, ended August 31, 48 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Cancer is such a horrible thing, especially when someone so great, so heroic has to experience it first hand. The poem itself had very unique wording and was written very well. Thank you for entering my contest.
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I found this very interesting, its actually written in a very uniqe way, I like it.
I also love to raw emotion in it, and how its all tied together. and how you've got just teh right amount of details making the imagery so vivid, yet not over detailed. Good work, I wish you the best of luck in the contest and thank you for this wonderful entry.
Id also like to appoligiez for this comment be late, and I am hopeing to get the contest judged tonight or this morning as well.
~ Chelsey -
i agree with the comment below i could definately see the poem play out .. i love poems like that good luck in the next round
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I absolutely LOVE the imagery in this. I could literally see the poem in my head, almost as if I were watching a movie.
Thanks for entering and good luck!
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Tragic, beautiful.
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