I went to find the moon
the lakes had another idea
and looked into a red clay sky.
I inhaled darkness
as it cut through the tired day;
I remembered the full moon
in a childhood night I'd looked in the air
for precious silver hair, missing since that strange day.
Another night when sky pale blue
held a bright half disk, and I asked
if I would ever hear another dear voice again;
an answer came to my skin, from the depth
and marrow of me.
Yet another night watching above the clouds
when crescent and brightest star locked in a close turn
it was a night alone, yet so full of love; and I wondered
where the rest of me would be,
when I'd again see such beauty with these eyes.
I went to find the moon,
in a night closed by cloud
and found my life opened wide,
raining down on me.
In a list
A contest entry
- filleted by Cat.
2450 points, ended April 25, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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i went to find the moon
in a night closed by cloud..
i love that line.. i think that could be your title..
or your final line without the following lines..
good stuff.. a gem
thanks for entering
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thank you...PK
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raining down on me.
come, we will find the moon along with the hopes of betterment
shedding tears under the shades of blue
keep up the good work
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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yes
really
thank you
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I like the juxtaposition of the moon and red clay...
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this is really well done and tells me why i have missed reading you while i was away. thank you for sharing this with me today and i wish you well in this contest that you have entered. hoping to see more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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This makes me want to go sit under a full moon and soak it up....
Stacy
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"I went to find the moon,
in a night closed by cloud
and found my life opened wide,
raining down on me."
Such mouth watering imagery!
You have used such rich language and emotion throughout, a job well done.
Thank you fopr sharing!
Regards,
Sophie,
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"it was a night alone, yet so full of love; and I wondered
where the rest of me would be,
when I'd again see such beauty with these eyes."
i've had nights like too...this is excellent, so perfect for the prompt, i really feel the separation from a loved one in this..
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Thank you Tara-
i usually wind up with a different idea on these prompts... than most
...thank you so much for reading and your very kind words...H
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when we feel that the day is falling like red sand through our fingers, we should just close our hands... this is beautiful,uplifting poetry, PK... aren't we the clay too..?
~ Nicolette
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Thank you Nicolette-
well as these things go, your comment will find it's way into a future poem too, yes, truly we are the clay..thank you so much...H
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OH, WOW! This is magnificent. The progression of the moon and the discovery of those dear... and of self...so inspiring. You know, such a real gleaning and understanding... and it has been passed on to us! So beautiful.
I love the structure of this... i think it contributes a significant part to its meaning and allure. Absolutely gorgeous write.
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Thank you Ten-
i think the idea of the moons different shapes was really as I remember it...and I associate those moments with the picture in my mind...thank you so much for your kind words, so much appreciated ...PK
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