Dropping the bottle
I dreamed across broken glass
Of worlds at the edge.
Author notes
Written February 27th, 2004
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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excellent
Yes this is very good. Now I must see more of you poems. I like the Tanka, Haiku and Senryu forms. Also, we may have a certain freedom. English traditional, what is that? Only 40 years or so, I say we are in possess of making our own tradition. -
I already saw this one
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No it didn't, I didn't say GREEN GLASS like everyone else lol.
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really great job. summed up the picture really well.
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I can't imagine another haiku that could capture that picture any better. Good luck in the contest.
take care -
Indeed, this world is on the edge, already shattering apart at the seams. While I'm not into haiku, once in awhile I find one that makes perfect sense and is penned so well: this is one of those few! Well done, Poet! ~~BonnieQ
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I personally suck at haiku's and could never write one from a picture with so much detail. But the line "I dreamed across broken glass" definately a image reader!
Thanks for entering
~~Jenn
btw--to upload the picture, right click the pic save as, then when editing your poem, go to the upload picture bar and upload the picture from where you saved it at. Hit save, and viola, the pic is there! -
If you click on the contest, that's where the picture is.
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hmmmmmmmmm lol...I didn't even get to see the picture in the contest, but it's an interesting poem anyway. Thanks for the comment on Niggling of a Scorned Nipple.
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I think that's it, precisely.
N... -
Thanks, lol. Long live Evil!?
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there is not enough of you in this piece, i think, to make me want to like it. in your other works there is a certain twist of you that eminates..and i recognize it usually, as yours.
i find this, too dreamy, too tender...
good...just i think, lacking in you.
Nyx... -
Puts the bottle back together for just one last swig...
Wipes her mouth and says mmm mmm good.
Yep, this sums the pic up brilliantly.
"I dreamed across broken glass" is a magnificent line.
Each time I read it, it consorts to different meanings and depths..
*stomps -
oh. i dreamed across broken glass. despite it's catagory, that is just a haunting statement. i love you in haiku as well. missing you somehow though. "cackle"
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Haiku.... gesundheit.
A lovely little piece that pretty much sums up the photo with no wasted words.
Best of luck in the contest! -
Intresting I find this one. Good luck.
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